Snacks While You Wait (A True Story) Lyrics

Gotta get to the airport three hours early

Just to make sure I pass through airport security

I shave my beard to avoid being randomly selected

But somehow always end up getting prodded and fondled

The TSA agent yells at me for half an hour

How dare you bring enough soap for a shower

I finally make down to my gate

Only for me to hear the desk agent say

This flight has been delayed

It's going to be two hours late

Don't worry it's okay

We've brought some snacks while you wait!

This flight has been delayed

It's going to be two hours late

Don't worry it's okay

We've brought some snacks while you wait!

There's a flight to the same place leaving from the opposite gate

You try to book that flight, to no avail

You hear them offer vouchers if passengers skip that flight

But even still it remains overbooked through the night

They're no point stressing I say to myself

But I have a bad feeling and start to sweat

I'm Chilling at the gate my flights only an hour away

Oh what's that- a text flight update?

This flight's been further delayed

It may not even leave today

But don't worry it's okay

We've brought some snacks while you wait

This flight's been further delayed

It may not even leave today

But don't worry it's okay

We've brought some snacks while you wait

I try to call customer service

And this is what they said

"All available representatives are busy assisting other customers.

Please Hold"

I'm finally on the plane along with this crying baby

Who won't stop kicking the back of my seat

I put on my headphones to try to get some sleep

But then this baby starts to yell and scream

5 hours later we've finally landed

We rush out the plane with all of our baggage

Everyone orders their Lyft or Uber home

And make audible gasps when they look at their phone

Your car has been delayed

There's hella traffic in the way

It's prolly not okay

You won't get home today

Your car has been delayed

There's hella traffic in the way

It's prolly not okay

You won't get home

You won't get home

You won't get home today