Crooked Lyrics

Michael had a crooked penis

His mom was Vietnamese

His father was in the war

They lived in the San Fernando Valley

Michael and his mom

And his little brother

Without their dad

Michael stared at me

From across the room

And smiled

And stared some more

And then came up and said hello

And asked me on a date

He didn't have a car

But I did

So I drove out to the valley

Where he'd prepared a picnic

At a park

In a secluded place

Where we could chat and cuddle

I drove out to the valley again

And picked him up

To bring him to my family's house

At the beach

We went swimming

I taught him how to body surf

He wasn't very good

But it was his first time

In the ocean

And he was fearless

And smiling

And I

Smiled back

I'd been elected president

Of my high school

So over that summer

I went to student council camp

3,000 high school

Student leaders

From across the state

Of California

Where we engaged in workshops

And team building exercises

And I wrote letters to Michael

Every night

Thinking about his crooked penis

That I discovered on that day

When I brought him to the beach

And didn't say

Anything

I'd just become quiet

And he noticed

And asked about it

And I said it was nothing

Nothing's wrong

One day at leadership camp

We gathered in the auditorium

And watched a film

Based on the human relations camp

I was already a youth leader at

For the last two years

The film, like the camp, talked about

Racism

And then

Sexism and then

Anti-Semitism and then

Homophobia and then

They turned the lights back on

And the facilitators facilitated

A conversation

About everything

In the film

Except homophobia

Even though the auditorium

Had broken out in jeers and laughs

During that section

I started to sweat

And to breathe heavy

Wondering what to do

Feeling like

Like I was going to explode

I got up

Walked outside

Made up my mind

Went back in

And raised my hand

Thinking maybe someone else

Would too

After I had

But no one else did

I was alone

Wondering out loud

Why the facilitators

Had done this to me

To others like me

Why did you set us up

And then let us down?

I can't remember

How they responded

But I suppose

They did somehow

But I was alone

And I walked out alone

Surrounded by

Everyone else

And I stayed at the camp

Until it was over

Alone

Writing to Michael

Struggling to put my experience

Into ink

Onto paper

Into an envelope

Into the mail

To arrive to Michael

Sometime later

Wondering what I would ever do

With his crooked penis

It wasn't just bent

It was crooked

Like a boomerang

Word spread

And my high school

Took on the name bi-high

Over the summer

On account of me

I got my ears pierced

And wore a silver male symbol

In each ear

On the first day of school

I felt like everyone

Was staring at me

All of the time

And I had dropped Michael

Without explanation

Though he pled for one

Became angry when I

Wouldn't give him one

Maybe if he'd mentioned

His crooked penis

Himself I would have

Said something

But he didn't

And I couldn't say it

So I

Couldn't say anything

He didn't have a car

He lived in the valley

I could avoid the places

I knew he went

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