DESERVE Lyrics

Crawl out from under the overdose

Plainclothes watching so I gotta keep my secret close

Timecode, run it back

Wake up in an ambulance

Got marks, ain't running track

If it's a race, call this a record setting victory lap

Ten seconds from the top to the bottom

Ain't a fucking role model

I'm just stuck in all my problems

They're killing me

Hallucination slowly turns reality

I used to promise I would never touch sniff

That's a lie; I just said it cause I couldn't admit

That hope was never there, only saw the despair

Generational pain, was my mother's cross I bear

And her mother and her mother and her fucking grandmother

Fear and anxiety set in my biology

Studied chemistry, never got good grades

But I'm street smart, I know exactly what to take

Physically, I'm falling apart

Try to stay together, I'm never easy on the heart

Marathon lines in these troubling times

One day I'll drop, I'm sure the choice was never mine

If it was, would be through by now

But I'm still here somehow

Stand up and take a bow

It all stops when the penny drops

Living ghoul, a paradox

The holy gates forever locked

Guess I get what I deserve, don't I?

It all stops when the penny drops

Guess I got what I deserved

Isolation served with a side of just deserts

Yeah, I guess it's all my fault

Smoking grade waiting for my early grave

Man, it's just too much to take

Just threw up in the lobby

Escorted outside, dare security to stop me

Only there for a link

Stop and think

Watch my life toppling down

Let the public gather round

I put my heart out on display

I left my mind backstage

Like a bird let out a cage

I'm never coming back again

Separate myself from pain

Depersonalisation

That isn't me in the mirror

Just the ghost of paths I've taken

Fork in the road where the two shall meet

Both come to same defeat

Ain't no sermon left to preach

Ain't no lesson left to teach

Just don't repeat my mistakes

End of line, turn the page

Guess I get what I deserve don't I?

It all stops when the penny drops