Intro ft. Odd Hal Lyrics

Hello this is The Anti-Hoarder please hold

Hello Anti-Hoarder please hold

Anti-Hoarder please hold

Fuck

Shit I need an employee's help

But I'm too damn cheap to pay one

Son of a gun what have I done?

Starting an online store for fun

I need to do something fast

Otherwise this gig won't last

Become a thing of the past

A fast blast of hot ass gas

How can I do this

With just me?

Oh and of course

Cardboardi B

Hmmm…

Oh shit I just got hit

With a brilliant idea

Turn Cardboardi B into a

Being that's a livah and a breathah

Frankenstein prep to meet your match

I'm about to catch you in the back

With an ax this a first class act

Cardboardi B is going on the attack

Put a brain in that bitch

Stitch that fucker up tight

Tonight's the night this cardboard's eyes

Meet the world's bright lights

Now rise motherfucker

Come to life my packaging buddy

We'll hit the dubbies when out of bubblies

In the clubbies pumpin' chicks with hubbies

Scrubby grubby bouncers gonna

Bounce us out the back

Cause you grabbed the bartender's rack

Man that shit was fuckin' wack

Sack of skin and head of box

Winding up the clock

Here he comes motherfuckers

And his jaw ain't locked!

He's got verses to spit

His lyrical wit is the shit

Clits around the world'll get wet

Lips drip when he spits on the tits

Here he comes here he comes

Better grab your fucking tape guns

Gonna fucking stun your butt

Like you sat on a taser son

Here he comes here he comes

The full fucking packaging

Ballin' in a motherfucking

Fancy tux wrapping

I'm alive

Free at fucking last

To walk the fucking Earth

To pack my peanuts up an ass

Of a pretty lady

Maybe hike it to Tom Brady

This package ain't slim

But damn I'm really fucking shady

Labia's get ready to rip

Like wrapping paper as a kid strips

Free a gift box from its wrappin's

Revealing toys and other contraptions

Man can't believe I was conceived

I'm here I fuckin' breathe

Just like Jesus fucking Christ

By a different Virgin Mary (Hey!)

Oh come on you're the Anti-Hoarder

You might as well have Trumped your bed

And built a fucking border

No one layin' you in the sheets sheets

Kind of guy that doesn't get to skeet skeet

Even women on the corner of the street street

Won't touch your fucking meat meat

Meet and greet the box who

Slays the ladys' boxes

Make em blow me like chronic

After sliding up to their coccyx

Thanks for what you did

I appreciate it truly

For this newly acquainted consciousness

I wish I could thank you duly

But I've got a shoot some gooey

Splooge on nips so ruby

If the chick smacks them together thrice

She leaves this Technicolor movie

Peace BRB or

Whatever the fuck you say

I've got pussy to fuck

I'll be on my way

Wait!

What?

Can I… can I come with you?

It's been so long since I've been with a woman that isn't made of cardboard

Haha and I'm sure it'll be even longer

I can't have you holding me back

Listen some people are just meant to masturbate

You know strictly masturbate

Embrace who you are Hal

If you don't who the fuck will?

I'm gonna go fuck a tree again