The Problem With Pigs Lyrics

Have a swig and a swallow

Your pig's gonna follow you

Down to the five and dime

He's a little bit shady

Cuttin' eyes at your lady

I think he's trynna beat your time

This 'shine is a corker

And I'm sure he wants to pork her

You better keep an eye his way

Look there in his trotter

There's petunias that he bought her

What more do I have to say?

You can huff about it puff about it whatcha gonna do?

Whatcha gonna do when your pig cuckolds you?

He's dirty and smelly

With his big old pork belly

But he's goin' after you know who

First he gives a little squeal

To express his sex appeal

Then he does a little wallowing jig

But by the time he gets her going

She has no real way of knowing

That he's just another chauvinist pig

The fact here that I'm floating

He's a wolf in pig's clothing

I'm not trying to offend

My sincere diagnosis

She's gon' catch some trichanosis

Putting lipstick on your piggy friend

You can huff about it puff about it whatcha gonna do?

Whatcha gonna do when your pig cuckolds you?

He's dirty and smelly

With his big old pork belly

But he's goin' after you know who

You better get down in the mud

And nip it in the bud

Or your piggy friend will never stop

Show him your the time to beat

By pickling his feet

And take him to the butcher shop

He may cry "oui oui oui"

And try to break free

But don't let him get greasy and gone

Bid farewell to your pig

Have a swallow and a swig

And relax because supper is on

You can huff about it puff about it whatcha gonna do?

Whatcha gonna do when your pig cuckolds you?

He's hammily delicious

In so many pork dishes

From bacon bits to barbecue