Stalked by a Stranger Lyrics

Ahhh it’s gonna be a great night tonight

Anything can happen

The minute I opened my eyes I was feeling on top of the world

It seems ridiculous now looking back considering how my day unfurled

It was Friday it was payday it was gonna be off the scale

But I never even made it out and I’ll tell you the tale

I checked my phone and I clambered out and tossed back the linen and

Then I went downstairs and I made some toast and I watched some Loose Women

Peter Andre and Michael Ball were on but I don’t know what they were discussing

I checked my phone and the lads were lively the group chat was buzzing

Big night tonight we were gonna meet up and sink a few jars

Living large

Casino for a few hours then we’ll hit up some bars

You know we’ve known each other years these fellas all went to school with me

It was gonna be a night of shenanigans and some classic tomfoolery

But first I knew I had to take a trip into town

To get some cash and threads and a double Greggs I’ve got this nailed down

I was parched and I couldn’t be arsed to go and wait for the train

And so I jumped into my car and took it to park at Woodhouse Lane

I headed straight to Greggs for a corned beef slice and something fizzy

Had my feed and a look round Leeds it wasn’t exceedingly busy

I wanted a shirt some shoes and a belt so I headed over to Trinity

Flashed the plastic it felt fantastic it massaged my masculinity

My testosterone was pumping I must admit I was feeling flash

I checked my balance and withdrew two hundred pound cash

Now I’d got everything I need from town no reason to stay

Not even god himself could bring me down today was my day

I started walking back to the car when a bloke caught my eye

He was tall and bald and he looked like an intimidating guy

He reminded me of referee Pierluigi Collina

But with a black eye and a limp so this guy looked even meaner

I was like a defender being sent off I remember the resemblance was striking

His scent offended my senses as he got a bit close for my liking

His eyes were psychotic and he was staring right at me

So I got a march on time to hop it cos he looked like he wanted to stab me

Believe me I was feeling uneasy and queasy

His demeanor was sleazy

I mean he gave me the heebie jeebies and really clearly he didn’t fear me

And nearly stopped me in my tracks

I had a terrible feeling and I said to myself that I wouldn’t look back

I couldn’t resist the urge and I checked over my shoulder and then I saw what I didn’t Wanna see

This fella was following me

I was petrified cos I didn’t know why

But I can’t deny that a creepy guy with a glint in his eye

Sent a shiver down my spine and I felt that earth was swallowing me

My head was harassed I just wanted to get on it

My ass emitted a blast that had more gas than Hailey’s comet

I took one more glance and corroborated any suspicions

He’d sped up too I immediately knew that I didn’t have any decisions

I clocked that he was on the phone

Was I dreaming it was starting to bug me

Suddenly I’d never felt so alone

I had a feeling he was smarting to mug me

I started pegging it and picking up the pace

He was legging it and it became a race

I was sweating but it wasn’t gonna be far

I just needed to get my arse back to the car

I was racking my brain, I was thinking had I seen him before

Situation seemed so insane, what the hell was he chasing me for

He seemed to be slowing and I was getting away with ease

I reached into my pocket and started fumbling for my keys

My car was in sight I was sure that I’d given him the slip

It was gonna be a great tale tonight when I’d be steaming like the funnel on a ship

Then out of the blue someone jumped out by the side of me

And time slowed down

He ran at me and pushed me and my ass hit the deck

Flippin ‘eck

Before I could even blink he had his hands round my neck

He was smaller but stronger and he’d caught me by surprise no lies

He fought with no honour and he had blood in his eyes

Then baldy steamed in and he booted me straight in the side

He proceeded to bray me and maybe he’d slay me he made me afraid for my life

I struggled underneath and I got him back with one on the nose

Just take my bag I pleaded with him as he rained down the blows

I felt like I’d been hit by Mike Tyson

I was sucking up the dust like a Dyson

Bricking it slipping out of consciousness I could see the white light on the horizon

I was looking straight up at him as his foot hit my jaw

As I saw my life flash before me I remembered where I’d seen him before

The same angry stare but the roles were reversed

He was only decking me now because I’d done him in first

That night no question we were off our nuts we were steaming

But to think we’d get away with it well I must’ve been dreaming

Last Friday it had all kicked off when we were getting our scran

When there were four of us and one of him and we chinned him and ran

Now I’d a flashback and as it happened I’d been burying the memory

Of giving him a rocket and seeing his eye socket as it snapped like a celery

But now my time was through it was cruel but beautiful witnessing karma

My head was the ball on the tee and he was lining up a swing like Arnold Palmer

It was then that I knew that I wouldn’t get a chance to make my amends

And so I closed my eyes with a wry smile as he took his revenge