Alone Lyrics

It was three days before the funeral

So happy to see me

The feeling was mutual

You wanted pictures and told me how mom was beautiful

Couldn't fight the feeling

It was too unusual

Joey dropped me off from a show that we did in Wichita

Told you how me him & JL was out there getting off

I miss the way that you would catch me on stage

And how we would chill and hang

Share stories and laugh for days but

That's just something I'm not getting back

No idea how much I would give to get that feeling back

Now it's thoughts in the air of loss and despair

And how much that it would affect me all through years

It still leaves me in paralysis

You were supposed to quit smoking go back to dialysis

Wait for me to put you on one of these fabulous immaculate multi million dollar palaces

Now all I have is this last conversation

Over the years it's been getting less hard to play it

Going through alla these memories had me remembering

Now you're gone and I fucking hate it

I don't know which was worse

Mother's Day was the day that you died

Or that I didn't even get a chance to say my goodbyes

All I know there's no way to disguise

All the pain in my eyes

How it feels like I'm wasting my time

All I do is ask and pray

God please give me the strength so I can masquerade

Sipping from a flask for days

So high I could catch a plane

Ain't seen my ass for days

Cuz I was afraid for any y'all to see my ass this way

There was no consoling me

Even from people that were close to me

Had no real way of controlling me

Cuz no matter how many times I'ma play this back

It'll never change the fact you're really gone from me

Lord help me

Wanted you to be healthy

But now you and mom are gone I'm alone and feeling empty

And there's nothing no one can tell me

All I can do is rely on these drugs and getting fucked up to help me