How The Christ Stole Christmas ft. BrooksOfYork Lyrics

Mommas up early in the kitchen making pancakes

I'm eyeing the presents, defying her mandate

Shaking a box

Now I'm shaking the crock

Of shit we built on top

It's a lot

Pagan holidays, adapt then erase

Who the fuck is Santa anyways?

There's no verse in the Bible mentioned

And I don't see us celebrating

John, Paul, or Michael

Angels, disciples, Apostles, recycled

Myths and lore and legends, entitled

Men in power who will devour anything that ensures their survival

Winter solstice and if you're holding frozen that childhood moment

Know it's not Father Christmas, it's Odin

You should be fiving when you get snowed in

Put your god on full stop

White-wash a Yule Log

This is how the Christ stole Christmas

Converts took an old dog

Dressed him up wrong

Baby, that's just Sol Invictus

Arti's back

All praise the J-name that lives up in the sky

He's a Capricorn with no dad and for some reason he's white

Got a best seller in bookstores and top drawers of hotels

Just read the part where he spreads the word

Gee, I hope the story ends well

Oh shit, I just remembered the Romans

12 times a day? Must be an omen

Aqueducts, that's the shit they invented

Don't forget about parades in the Senate

Caesar would love the way that I spit this

Cleopatra would swear she could get this

Put the soul in Sol Invictus

We remixed it and called it Christmas

Put your god on full stop

White-wash a Yule Log

This is how the Christ stole Christmas

Converts took an old dog

Dressed him up wrong

Baby, that's just Sol Invictus

Put your god on full stop

White-wash a Yule Log

This is how the Christ stole Christmas

Converts took an old dog

Dressed him up wrong

Baby, that's just Sol Invictus

All praise the J-name that lives up in the sky

All praise the J-name that lives up in the sky

Put your god on full stop

White-wash a Yule Log

This is how the Christ stole Christmas

Converts took an old dog

Dressed him up wrong

Baby, that's just Sol Invictus

Put your god on full stop

White-wash a Yule Log

This is how the Christ stole Christmas

Converts took an old dog

Dressed him up wrong

Baby, that's just Sol Invictus