disease & void Lyrics

My dear, my adore

Let me update you on the feelings under my skin

I can stir the relapsing chronic passion

The infection you gifted me

That's coming back like a pestering friend

Down in a hole leading to an exit into the void

Lay on me a sheet or two of poems I wrote

Your photo is requesting my trust again

Crawling with memories of a walk with you in the past

We walked through the valley of shadow of death

I had no fear but of you leading me astray again

From finding a way into you

Well, It's a troubled time when my useless spirit is turned on

Not any closer than before, not far from your bed either

Every filtered moment has a phase obstructing my judgment

Marking the final screenshots of my stalled day

Everything is still the same

Except for that sparkle in your eyes

My infatuation with your potent smile

Curls into a fetal stance of what's coming next

Behind these feelings

Comes the hummings of the kabbala spells in the breakup

A mutiny converging on me like a rabid disease

Isolating me from the world, I used to know

It shifts into different levels of optional exiles & suicides

But they all float in your orbit

I watch as you romance your pick of men, except me

I'm wrapped in my decaying skin

Waiting for the expiration date to take effect

There is so much to talk about before I go

I want to say. I'm not a poet

I just happen to adore you

I didn't mean to manifest your ego

Details of my blunders are in the rear-view mirror with my disease

I find things I touch can't feel me

Words I say won't echo too far

Images I dreamt won't stabilize

Visions I imagine won't fly high enough

Everything I do doesn't mean anything

But I'm feeling something out of the ordinary

The final chapter is so much clearer in the rear-view mirror

With my disease escorting me down into the void

I'm feeling emptiness

I'm feeling emptiness

And true feelings; this is

To know what it's like to be absolutely nothing

But manifesting three into one

Myself with my two companions

The disease you gave me

And the void you put me in