Gardener Lyrics

My strawberries have gone rotten in my garden

Can you help me with that at all?

Mr green thumb

I've heard you've got a knack for fixing up a patch off land that refuses to grow

Oh they say my soil ain't good enough

My soil is poor in nutrients

But I've been adding nitrogen

Until it can't take any more

And I've been journaling

This may not seem like gardening

But they still say that's important to grow

Oh all my friends are coming over

Coming over to my place to stay

And when my friends come over

They will all laugh in my face

My brain has gone rotten in my garden

Too much resting on my laurels

Not enough time pulling up weeds

Oh feels like a lobotomy

Well I don't know how that feels

But this gardening business

It does nothing for me

So Mr gardener

Come garden for me please sir

I've tried all of the tricks in the book

Except for planting the seeds

And I've been lying here

Pretty hard work and I'm full of fear

That my lying here

It will never cease

Oh all my friends are coming over

Coming over to my place to stay

And when my friends come over

They will all laugh in my face

A musician or an artist

A poet or a chemist

I don't want to be a gardener

I'll be a drunk or a nitty

All alone I'm not too picky

But I don't want to be a gardener

I'll be a stranger to my lover

As long as I don't hold a mower

I'll be stressed, I won't be a gardener

I'll be a fisher or a fashion icon

I'll be a terrible father to my future son

Because I won't look after my garden

And all my friends are coming over

Coming over to my place to stay

And when my friends come over

They will all laugh in my face