The Wizard in the Castle Lyrics

We used to hang out

At the Wizard in the Castle

Way back in '96

We got challenged

By a couple stupid assholes

To prove the size

Of our dicks

Well, guess who won

We fuckin' rocked that shit

Brought down the house

Fuckin' high scores lit

And when all was said and done

They wished they could've gone back

To before we had begun

We got all

The chicks that day

And by that

I mean none

But then we

Totally got sick

On Slurpees

At the nearby Allsups

Man those days

Were so fun

We fuckin' rocked that shit

Brought down the house

Fuckin' high scores lit

And when all was said and done

They wished they could've gone back

To before we had begun

We were the kings in the castle

Until the next week

When our scores were beat

By two different assholes

So the night our scores got beat, right

I was standing outside of

The Wizard in the Castle

With my boy Dave

And these two chicks

Tiffany and Amber walk in

And we're like

Yo, holy shit it's Tiffany and Amber

Or Stacy

Or whatever the fuck her name was

Who gives a shit, right

So we walk in

And we put our quarters down

On the machine

To claim the next shit, right

So, these chicks take our fuckin' quarters

Thinkin' they were for them

Put them, to, put, fuckin'

What the fuck

Put our quarters in the machine

And beat our own fuckin' high scores

With our own goddamn quarters

And it was fuckin' ridiculous dude

Whatever dude

I don't even

Dude, I don't even care anymore