end of my rope Lyrics

I said I was doing fine and they all believed me

I became accustomed to hiding wounds

That had cut me deeply

Disguised with laughter, like a mystery book

They failed to read me

I could've got an Oscar

For how I guarded my pain discreetly

How they see me

Is a constant fear in my brain

Cause if they discovered I was broke

They wouldn't see me the same

I'd have to reclaim, all the qualities I premiered

Even though I'd realize they just got a glimpse

Of me in the mirror

And that ain't no pretty picture

Like a summer twister that's growing

And on the verge of level 5

With all this pent up emotion

Nowhere to turn to bleed

This drink of loneliness is so potent

There ain't no saving me

When I don't know who's soul I've been holding

I'm thinking

Who am I

Where did I go

Why am I here

No hope

And losing my soul

Why am I

Lonely on my own will, I'm losing it

Why am I blind to how bad the bruising is

Yeah, I wish that it was different I know

Cause I'm at the end of my rope

Yeah, if I die young will they remember me

Will I become an afterthought or cherished memories

Will they say I aligned with God or with the enemy

The verdict ain't been clear

Cause I became who I pretend to be

It isn't me, I'm like a puppet but I'm in control

I show 'em smiles when in reality nobody's home

I claim I love the independence but when I'm alone

This vortex of emotion opens doors that lead to empty roads

And now I know

That life can change in a moment

One second you're holding hope

The next your mind isn't open

It's like a swing state

You can't predict what is chosen

That's why I was perplexed

The ballot showed me as an opponent

But was it wrong, no

I've always been what's holding me back

And for what it's worth in recent years

That's been my greatest regret

That I never asked for help

Cause I thought I could handle the stress

But now I'm breathing without knowledge

Of who's heart's in my chest and I'm thinking

Who am I

Where did I go

Why am I here

No hope

And losing my soul

Why am I

Lonely on my own will I'm losing it

Why am I blind to how bad the bruising is

Yeah, I wish that it was different I know (Wish it was different cause)

Cause I'm at the end of my rope

Who am I

Where did I go (Yeah, where did I go)

Why am I here

No hope

And losing my soul (losing my soul)

Why am I

Lonely on my own will I'm losing it

Why am I blind to how bad the bruising is

Yeah, I wish that it was different I know (I know)

Cause I'm at the end of my rope