The Regression Suite Lyrics

I don't know (How) it slowly takes control

It bubbles up inside and hollows out my mind

All I see is what we used to be

Every moment clear - I'm all alone I fear

Come and see my mental home movies

I never am the star - the villain though by far

A good day can slowly waste away

And all that it takes (Is) regression into...

Regression asks so much of me

But, through it I'm finding out who I'm s'posed to be

Look hard - the pain disguises the way home

I'm growing, can't you see?

I'm breathing off misery...

My enemy my memory has turned out to be

For me to learn and grow - this black pain I must know

I will go on - I cannot stay down that long!

But, why must it arrive? Regression into...

Regression takes a shot at me

But would it rip me apart - I won't wait 'round to see

Gone. Confined to the past

I had placed it here

There was no more to fear

Try to breath again...

I could smell victory!

I must leave the memory!

I hadn't counted on you coming back to insert yourself into my mind

The day of days was hollowed out

I can feel the sensation coming back...

Snatching defeat from the jaws of victory

Regression it asked so much of me

Waiting for it just to fall in front of me

Regression it asked...

Would you be the last?

I must learn this past

Another hear broke too fast

I must make this learning last...

I look up and look in

There's no way out of this mess, unless I cease to regress

"Hi" rubs salt in the wound

But, the wound is closing to - there's not much the salt can do!

I recommend to anyone a feeling just like this

But, I've grown up and out

No longer will I live this creed

Burn!

The feeling it returns

Another form

My stomach churns

Fright - awaken in the night

The feeling drags all to our knees

Make your first big new mistake

Concern arise

Life meeting death

Pray you don't go down this way

Affairs of heart

Hard to replace

Give it away

Trust it away

Know when to stay

Not know to stay

Retain!

Duality remains

The heart explodes

Awaken death

Refrain!

Don't board the next train

To let it die

The eyes forget

Enjoy the way

We band to save

Know it will waste

Not know to wait

Wait... before it gets too late

This powerless feeling is not my piece of fate

Now I see, I think that this could be

The temptation rising up to put my trust in me

Looking inward I start to identify

Sharp edges that must go

Try to turn around again

Make a massive change - deny the regression

In my weakness You have strength

But for that be, I must kneel

And give it all away

Lay my body down

To be worked upon

Unlocking doors that I barred up

And leave no stone unturned

For me to learn and grow

This black pain I must know

If I consider what I've lost

I'll know how much I own...

Run the race into life

There are hills and valleys along the way

Pick your feet up - rise again

You'll be floored many more times yet

It's not the fastest or the highest

You can't measure life from pace

The only way into life

Is intent to always move ahead one step at a time...

Turn away into life

Walk ahead to a light

I know there is no other way

Stand me up to the light

I cast a shadow black as anything

Stand me up to another man

More oft than not I bet I'd pale against the human candle

But, this I see is a part of me

A need to measure when the measuring's done

Just let it go - move on by

One foot ahead of the other - go on, distance yourself

We elect few that walk on by

The race is won, we are sure of it

We are deceptive in our size

We are weighed, never counted

When the end-line, I meet

I will see a win I should never have

For the sweat was never mine

Once I knew this I only ran ahead step after step after step...

Father, hear these words brought from the hole I'm in

Call to arms to level out the Transgression… yeah!

One ear to the diagnostic whisperings

A hole is found that will cause the end of things

It's not just the blood loss from the hole that stings

So much more, the infection of guilt it brings!

Discovering the fresh wound, I end its sin

But I'm left with feeling faint – the drag begins

Effectiveness lessens as I'm drawn within

I can't fight with parasites beneath the skin

It envelops me – moves to sink its teeth

I try to thrash against its theme, but I am left a reeling

Will not allow myself to give it away

Refuse to give in… fight on through the pain…

It's only with open eyes that I see

I could never win this fight – stupid me

As I fade, God kicks in, brings it peace

Its only when I am strong that He feels weak

There is now no condemnation for those who

Are in Christ for he has met the debt of sin

Father, hear these words brought from the hole I'm in

Call to God to level out the Transgression… yeah!

With sudden panic I recall the dire state of others

My trepidation at the reckoning

A fear that I keep hidden underneath the surface

Under my lazy Christianity

For on the day of Sunrise, will I stand all alone?

Or can I scrape a meager offering?

I feel the pressure building – "I am responsible"

Who can I drag next, kicking, screaming?

God's a big boy – He can handle

All unbelief, all our scandal

When all we know passes away

He will gather all, will gather all

I am blocked by people moving on, by all the changing weather

By that the regular is comforting

How can I plead the choices – to activate the hole

To always pray to gather kindling?

Does God not see panic? Surely I am not alone

There must be others out there struggling!

I feel the pressure mounting – who is responsible?

The halls of men could soon be emptying…

Wait for a world that cannot be

The plan to separate all things

Is it what we did?

Is all-love hindered?

I must trust that in the end I'll see

But – am I free?

Forcing words that should not come

Broke the line again have I

Musing once more will take its place

As I wait…

I allow my heart to break, to weigh injury against the sand

Conjuring to bring a new regression – another type

I stir the broth; produce the words that paint me in a separate light

All the while ignoring the person I was meant to be!

Forced an outcome again

Pushed a line up to its end

I have learnt to cloud my virtue

Too much I'm using my own strength…

I've just seen a circle that would crush me if I dwell in there

The fact that I must live this life again, again, again, again…

It's only now that I see it – the repetition's crystal clear

A disconnect that heralds: this is not the plan that God created!

I just fell in line with another

Someone old I'd put to the cover

Not sure how useful it was

To dredge him again

It took four lots of wrong to discover

That I liked to write of my lover

Create another type of song

Write it a hundred times...

Give up!

Now I see how much I can wither

Make my spirit blister and splinter

Not sure how useful it is

Regress another time

I see now the goals of another

I see now how much I can cover

Lift my eyes up from the page

Write it a hundred days...

Get up!

Reincarnation is real

Not the 'I-was-Napoleon-in-a-former-life' crap

Or 'if-I-don't-behave-myself-I'll-come-back-as-a-turtle-or-something'

But the idea that every year - every day!

You have the power to reinvent yourself

To become something new, something greater

You have the choice to cut off things

That make you less than you ought to be

And become 'reincarnated' as a new version of you

Something closer to what God made you to be

I don't know (How)

I let it take control

To always gaze inside

It hollowed out my mind

I have moved on

Ironically with a song

As beautiful as Your Size

Progression into You

Regression, it has no claim on me

Now that I'm new again, I won't wait around to see

Look how despite I found my way home

I'm growing, can't you see

Especially now I'm free...