Monkey Stuart Lyrics

Once I was a farmer now I'm bloody well dead

I was caught eating lamb straight out the

livestock shed!

They taught me karate and they taught me how to poo

But now I look like monkey and me nickname's Monkey Stu!

I was pissing in a bucket but now I'm pissing on the floor

Eating Chinese curry that I've stolen from the poor

I was living off the land but now I'm pissing out some sand

And they call me Monkey Stu for short

Once I had an haircut but they removed my head

I looked like Martin Clunes in a jet-powered hospital bed!

I was sipping on Bovril chewing on my bread But now it seems my dream is dead!

I was pissing in a bucket I was pissing on the floor

Eating Chinese curry that I've stolen from the poor

I was living off the land but now I'm pissing out some sand

They call me Monkey Stu for short!

Ergh!

Stay wut her Ronny!

Go get it! (Oh ain't that the truth ain't that the truth ain't that the truth!)

I was pissing in a bucket now I'm pissing on the floor

Eating Chinese curry that I've stolen from the poor

I was living off the land but now I'm pissing out some sand

And they call me Monkey Stu for short

Once I had a tractor and I chose to call it Gaz (Gaz!)

But when I lost my head I changed its name to Baz! (Baz!)

I was king of all things pasta

Now I'm king of all things dead!

But just like Willie Nelson

I'm pissing in my hair (Hair!)

I was pissing in a bucket I was pissing on the floor

Eating Chinese curry that I've stolen from the poor

I was living off the land but now I'm pissing out some sand

And they call me Monkey Stu for short

I was pissing in a bucket but now I'm pissing on the floor

Eating Chinese curry that I've stolen from the poor

I was living off the land but now I'm pissing out some sand (Ow!)

And they call me Monkey Stu for short