ALL MY LIFE Lyrics

I ain't done this in a minute

Open up to someone and explain my feelings

Cause the last time I swore it was the last time

Cause the last time I told some lady how I was feeling

That was therapy I'm talkin bout and we dove deep

Even told her at night time I be counting sheep

Tryna fall asleep

But I can't cause every time I close my eyes these demons always try to get me

Then I gotta hide up underneath the sheets

Being suffocated

While everybody else is dedicated following they path

Working on they craft

Getting together with all of their loved ones so they can laugh

The point of the story she ain't care for me

The only reason why she was talking to me was for that paycheck

Then she told me that I need to get my life in check

Told me that the only thing to help me was that medication

I said fuck that so I started meditating

All my feelings got me feeling jaded

Man I miss my brother Jayden

Yeah the devil got me running to the iron maiden

I been running even tho I know that I ain't got no destination cause

All my life I been running, running

Running from pain

Running from shame

Now I feel like my family just don't see me the same

Run

I ain't done this in a minute

Try and push myself way past my limits

Truth is I don't know what to say right now

Cause I'm feelin so numb to the pain right now

And I been living life for 21 years

And for 10 years I've been conquering my fears

The fears have nobody and ima die alone and

Not having anyone to ever call my phone

Maybe I will never have kids of my own

Maybe not even have a place to call my home, that's fine

I done fucking moved like a hundred damn times

People don't notice me I'm like a damn mime

I was waving and jumping and looking tryna get their attention but everybody's lookin right through me because I'm transparent

Had to grow up not having both parents

I'm a failure cause

All my life I been running, running

Running from pain

Running from shame

Now I feel like my family just don't see me the same run

All my life I been running, running

Running from love

Running from hope

Was using so many drugs just so I could cope yeah

I've been a failure for too long

Every single day I gotta grow strong

My bones they break

For goodness sake

I push you away to keep you safe

It's hard not to be this way

I've made way too many mistakes

I can't seem to break out of this cage

I let people invade my brain

Hey son

I just wanted to let you know, that I love you

Everything in life is gonna work out

And most of all, I believe in you