drugstore Jesus Lyrics

Bought a cross at the pharmacy down the block

Called him drugstore Jesus

Not exactly sure why they 'em in stock

But I guess it was convenient

And it reminded me of you

If Jesus dyed his hair and got tattoos,

I could buy you at Walgreens with a coupon from last June

And oh, how perfectly it fits

'Cause obviously you're God and I'm your bitch

I'm just glad I found you drugstore Jesus

I'm just glad I found you drugstore Jesus

Oh, you're a masochist

One of the dirty kinds

That's why you asked for this

To numb out your hurting mind

Oh, you're a masochist

A begs-me-for-mercy guy

One of the dirty kinds

But I'm not the first to find

Drugstore Jesus

You're not a prophet, you're just a man

Drugstore Jesus

You're not the next coming of Christ, but maybe I am

I'm analyzing your movements

I can tell what you're doing

I'm reading your body language 'til I'm fluent

I'm analyzing your movements

I can tell what you're doing

And if you're God, then prove it

If you're God, then prove it

Then prove it

Drugstore Jesus

You're not a prophet, you're just a man

Drugstore Jesus

You're not the next coming of Christ, but maybe I am

You're a curse, you're a fraud

You're the smoke, the mirrors, and the fog

A nasty cold I caught

Runny nose, choking on my snot

You're not God

You're the smoke, the mirrors,

And you're the fog

You're the lions, you're the tigers, you're bears

And you're the forest that they haunt

You're not Jesus

You're not what I prayed for

But I'm a weak man with an itch

And you're the prettiest whore

Yeah, you're not Jesus

You're not what I prayed for

Just some cheap shit

I could find at the drugstore

You're not a prophet, you're just a man

You're not the next coming of Christ, but maybe I am