Fully Qualified Gangsta Lyrics

Fully qualified gangsta, here he comes

Undergrad in Rhyming and Masters in Guns

And a PhD in Being a Baller for Life

From the University of Fucked Your Wife

'Cos looking this good while I'm killing this rap is my gangsta religion

I'm fly and I'm street like a... pigeon

On the mic and the streets I'm bred to be deadly

The hood's in my genes like I got dressed incorrectly

Evidently better than these hip hop stars

You know I'm the GOAT 'cos this kid got baas

These rappers ain't nothing, I'm utterly bossin' this

Droppin' bangers like I'm clumsy with sausages

Massive attacker, actual fact I snap on the track and these rappers will scatter

Natural gangsta, added to that the patter and swag of an absolute shagger

I stay ready with my sexing utensil

Always got that rubber on the end like a pencil

Your girl loves my sex and how hard I hit it

Inside her for so long, my dick got a parking ticket

Ladies don't like me - wait I'm pretendin'

For me these hoes long: fire engine

I've just got so many women to do

I gave your lady fingers like tiramisu

Your girl blew me long like a didgeridoo

Stuck my head in that honey: Winnie The Pooh

In my two-door Mustang, your girl made me beg

Yeah I got laid in the coupe like an egg

And I deal marijuana I've got spliffs to sell

Weed in my pockets like I've pissed myself

I roll all of my joints with a BIC pen

Known to hit a massive bong: Big Ben

Igniting weed 'til I'm mindless (aaah)

Burning joints like arthritis (ow)

Getting stoned as fuck from the hash I'm blazing

Ridiculous high like backhand waving

And I've got a really big gun in my fleece

I'm firing rounds like I'm sacking the obese

My gun fires bullets at unholy decibels

It's a beauty with the bangs: Zooey Deschanel

My automatic rifle's deafening when I fire it

Said I got that loud AR like a pirate

My gun's so big you'll know you're in danger

I'm not Ginny Weasley but I'll open the chamber

Gun in each hand and my trigger finger itchy

I'm cold with these two nines: Mr Whippy

Stuff guns in my jacket 'til the buttons won't join

Coat of arms on my back like an old pound coin

So don't mess with my guns, yeah, you've heard the stories

They go off suddenly like a punnet of strawberries

How am I so sick? I put in the work

Why am I the greatest? I put in the work

How do I do it? I put in the work

Why's my dick so big? Genetics

Big dick nerd with a rap obsession

Got a fat erection and a stamp collection

So give me the job 'cos my shit is crazy

I'm not a midwife but I deliver, baby