Heavy Lyrics

I've been told everything I write has that kinda 'heavy' sense to it

When you carry the weight of the world on your shoulders

The blessings and burden of family on your back

Guilt in your heart

A combination of children work finances and fear of being shot

All while being black

Your pen becomes exactly that

Heavy

As a black man in America it's difficult to keep a smile on our faces

We do it anyway

Sometimes carrying this skin is too heavy to bare

We do it anyway

They've only cared about our muscle but our struggle has become our strength

But who do we lean on when things get tough for us

Black men ain't taught to talk about it

My friends say I should write

Fellas say hit the weights

My family says pray

I am the holy trinity of therapy for black men

A Poet a Pastor & a personal trainer

Yet what I've learned about slam the gym and church

Are the pressures to be perfect and develop a praiseworthy body of work

I must get as close to 10 as possible

That's the score sets and commandments

But get crucified if the disciples don't believe in my work or word

So I work with the weight of the words I put in these bars before they snap

Because sometimes they heavy

As in the man that carries the sin

The hand that holds the pen

The vein that joy and pain are in

Black men ain't taught to talk about it

My people say write, pray or lift weights

But both the church and the gym come with books of Judges depending on how much is on the plate

People still in their Genesis think they can Chronicle my Revelations but don't know what I keep in Psalm helps me do Numbers and make an Exodus from these stressful Acts of life

I'm preachin yall

I've worked hard to build this muscle and this faith and still have trouble pressing off the pressure

Oftentimes I curl up in my pew and shrug it off

I Dip depression, push-up prayers and hope God heard me

What goes up must come down - a Burpee

Leaving me standing there

Hand shakin heart racing and sweatin

Second guessing if writing, prayer or working out is working out

I lift prayer - Push weights and pen poems

Hoping my bars are as hard as my arms

So I can protect myself from the lies scores and stones you throw

Black men ain't taught to talk about it

Judged when we do, judged when we write judged when we lift judged when we pray

Judged if we cry

I wipe my tears with the same cloth I'm cut from

That's why my skin so rough

When enough becomes enough is usually breakfast for us

Served a plate of pain

Life often scrambled and over-easy

Cup runeth over with stress

Too heavy for the tables so we hold that up too

The bible says the meek shall inherit the earth

But what about the bevy of burdens that come with it

Black men ain't taught to talk about it

My pen turns spotter to help release this gift

But if the poem don't make you feel resurrected, call it a dead-lift

You welcome me to the church the gym and the slam

Say come as I am

It's a judgment free zone

It ain't about the points it's about the poem

But I can't even write one without being judged, oftentimes by myself

I ain't never been taught to talk about it just told to hide the heavy

We wear it so you don't have to

We carry it so you don't have to

In the name of the poet the pastor and personal trainer

We pray A man is strong enough to carry the weight of the world on his shoulders

Ain't a scale that can measure that

The expectation is to gain faith lose weight and replace this pain with poetry

The pen has been my support beam

It keeps me upright - row

Chin up so the world can't see me frown

If a black man falls in the forest does his trauma make a sound

Since the beginning of time the black man has always had to pick things up

Never realizing how much it weighs us down

We physically lose weight but everyday we put on pounds

But I've learned to accept that

Heavy

Will always be the head that wears the crown