Lost <3 Lyrics

And I didn't want to know what it was like

Alone in this world just doesn't seem right no

It's hard coming home to nothingness on your own

But I long for something special if only but now you gone

Wish I listened I didn't I'm stuck in your prison

I dug my own grave but now I'm out here on a mission

My visions are blurred by doubters who never heard

I trapped myself beneath my sorrows just so I don't get hurt

It didn't work I'm out here just losing myself

You never know what you have until it's done and I failed

Now just look at us knew that I was not enough like cooper rush

I'm not saying much I can't be enough

I just need to puff puff passing it

I'm not having this I'm not average bitch

Look what the past had did It broke me down

Show me what it was to fall in love and now I hate you

Do I blame you I can't blame you I'm the same as you

And I don't want to act like I didn't mess you up I know that it's true

When you called me out asked me for my phone I didn't do it

I just dodged it like a wrench yeah I know I put you through it

I'm the worst of the worst of the worst you the best of the best

Tell me why I live for nothing why not die like the rest

Cause I can't take the stress

Where's my lioness, I need higher meds

Doctor can you save me from myself cause I am dying here

I can't take it no I'm not reliable

Why you put your trust me in me just look at what you dying for

Lying in the cold I don't got home to go home to

Dying when you old that isn't nothing I'm going to do no

And I'm not making it through

I finally reached my doomsday guess I'm gone like a pouf

Now I'm nodding off looking for a high that I can hold on too

I hate our dialogue I wish that I could hate you to

But that's just me you don't know how much I'm hurting

I blame myself nobody else she was so fucking perfect

I'm worthless and cursed in

My purpose has surfaced

If god can hear me do you think that I'm a bad person

I fucked up I get it

The bad guy I'm him

My life's been full of nothing but this anguish turning grim

Oh just look at me is that me I can't tell

It gets so dark up in this world like I'm walking through hell

I'm irrelevant yelling at stupid relatives begging for money cars clothes chains fame

I don't know your fucking name

I don't owe you nothing quit asking me cause I'm buzzing

They talking like we was cousins they come up to me in public

Like who the hell are you

Acting like you knew me back in school

I find it funny watch these people come up to me like they do

Like where the fuck was you

When I didn't know what the fuck to do

When I didn't know who the hell I was

Felt like I's stuck up in this loop

And I don't know I don't know sometimes I just get real low

It's the coke and the smoke strippers dance around that pole

I'm on that late night hustle you like to make life trouble

I'm bout to take flight levels until we shine bright special

She on that codeine-fiending I'm on that codeine-leaning

She wish she was my queen and I'll be honest I didn't really mean it

When I filled her head with that bullshit

Taught you how to just lose it

I'm about to just lose it

I don't want to just lose it

And I didn't want to know what it was like

Alone in this world just doesn't seem right no

It's hard coming home to nothingness on your own

But I long for something special if only but now you gone

Wish I listened I didn't I'm stuck in yo prison

I dug my own grave but now I'm out here on a mission

My visions are blurred by doubters who never heard

I trapped myself beneath my sorrows just so I don't get hurt

I can't take it no I'm not reliable

Why you put your trust me in me just look at what you dying for

Lying in the cold I don't got home to go home to

Dying when you old that isn't nothing I'm going to do no