Totally Busted

When my girlfriend’s gone, I can heavily drink, I can pee in the sink.

Yea, I feel empowered.

At home, when I’m all alone,

I don’t brush my teeth. I don’t take a shower.

And when she finally comes home, yea, I’m totally busted,

Reaffirming that I can’t be trusted.

Like a total deadbeat, I can tell that she’s disgusted.

Yea, I’m totally busted!

When my girlfriend’s gone, I can choose every song, and I’m never wrong.

Yea, it’s totally bitchin.

If I want, at the crack of dawn,

I can bang on the drums without permission.