Kill Switch Lyrics

I wish I had a kill switch

For the darkness that brought me down

Into this abyss

This psychic ditch full of piss

Like Donovan said

This is the season of the witch

Peep this

I can look back but not ahead

My neurotransmitters must all be dead

No wait

They're starting to twitch

They tell me my life is

Always gonna be a bitch

I know I know

This kinda thinking leads to Misery

Self-imposed exile and anguish

I'm paying what I call karmic vigorish

Stuck under a Bell Jar

Eatin' poison licorice

That's why I wish

I had a kill switch

Or maybe just some

Way outta this

Holy scripture says

My soul is precious amethyst

Or maybe it's

Just pustular and pimply

Or maybe I simply

Need to see a spiritual dermatologist

But that would imply

That this is surface level shit

And it's not

This is stab you in the third eye

Red dot up close

I'm givin' up the ghost

I tried everything

Okay maybe not everything

But a lot of shit

Got crossed off my checklist

Fuck a bucket list

A Buddhist once told me

I had a hole in my fortune bucket shit

I asked her to explain

She spouted doctrine

That didn't pertain

That's not how you speak

To a person in dire pain

I'm not mopin'

My soul is blistered and it's wide open

She really didn't consider

The knee-jerk answer she gave

And I understood

I'll probably take this

Depression to my grave

But I'm speaking truth

Truth about my own mental illness

How other people see it as weakness

When emotion chokes you up

And leaves you speechless

Summoning darkness is a talent

You can't teach this

I'm the triple-crown winner

The Derby the Belmont Stakes

And the Preakness

Mind soul

Mind soul

Mind soul

My mind splits into pieces

From the pressure my soul releases

The negative imagery never ceases

In the ripples and the creases of my brain

Which is reputedly

The seat of intelligence

But that's totally irrelevant

The imprint to destroy myself

Is buried deep

The way circus trainers

Train a baby elephant

Yeah

I'm about to spill my guts

Like a cat Wiggin' out on angel dust

Hearing voices that can't be trusted

Urging suicide all blood-lusted

Saying you don't cut the mustard

Subliminal shit way down encrusted

Blood diamonds and criminals

Of the Subconscious whispering

You incompetent stupid bastard

I'm trafficking in human life

Financing an insurgency

I don't love myself

And I need to

Do it now urgently

But the Universe is hostile

Or so I believe it to be

I know woe is me

Me and my violin symphony

So let's try this on for size

Lemme take you on an amusement ride

The feral mind the dragon slide

With hairpin turns

That lead to suicide

A lot of people have these issues

But they won't talk about it with you

Until it's too late

And then they say how much they miss you