Wishful Thinking (DEMO) Lyrics

I haven't felt okay in years

I drink and smoke away the tears

A living fucking wreck since age 14

Turn up the song so I stop feeling

Staring holes into the ceiling

Begging that I'll soon drift off to sleep

But when I close my eyes all I see are nightmares

I wish that I could spread my wings and fly and

I wish that this fucking skin really felt like mine

But I know that

Wishful thinking

Doesn't lead to

Anything ever

Happening at all

Duality within my head

A fine young man is lying dead

And I'm the fair maiden holding the gun

Reality is choking me

Rallied by systems that fail to see

I know myself better than they ever could

When I look in the mirror all I see are nightmares

I wish that I could spread my wings and fly and

I wish that this fucking skin really felt like mine

But I know that

Wishful thinking

Doesn't lead to

Anything ever

Happening at all

So what am I supposed to do

A woman on the inside

But not from any other point of view

I've become a husk of a human

Lost in shitty punk rock songs

So I do the only thing I can

I play my songs

For anyone who cares to listen

Or sing along

But there's still something that I'm missing

No perfect shape or pretty voice

Just a mess of hellish noise

But somehow that makes me feel okay

The miniskirts and pantyhose

My true shape beneath baggy clothes

Why can't I just look like a girl

Because when I go outside all I see are nightmares

I wish that I could spread my wings and fly and

I wish that this fucking skin really felt like mine

But I know that

wishful thinking

Doesn't lead to

Anything

Happening at all

Oh why can't

Wishful thinking

Ever lead to

Anything

Happening at all