Bleeding Mind Lyrics

As my mind keeps bleeding

Questioning whether or not I did the right thing

I pick up a pen to put it in writing

Write about how Its vessels keeps frying

As this heart keeps dying

Maybe it needs a jolt of lightning

Cause it gets tired of fighting

The doom is near and pending

And this is all too frightening

A defib wouldn't do the trick

At times I was a selfish prick

On occasion I couldn't contain the freak

When all I had to do was make you my pick

I am always cerebrally at war

These cranial Hemispheres I can't seem to ignore

The left is against and the right is for

Trying to decide which path is forward

Trust issues is on the high

Can't bear to see another guy say hi

Guy, I am in my room doing nothing

Nah, I am sure there is another guy in there nutting

These days I could never get it right

Get the right words to say

Hey, I like the way your hips sway

Dude! Why is your timing always off?

Hey babe, even saying the fine things pisses you off?

You needing times to cool off

The breaks wasn't enough

To stop the impending doom

As the clouds of sadness loomed over us

We seem to be, getting over us

Cause baby When you take those breaks

A part of My heart breaks

Each time I become less fearful

I become less of a fair fool.

Each time you teach me to care less

Unrealizing of how you are being careless

I could have used some forewarning

You could have given me 4 warnings

Even though it's 4am, it's not morning

Cos I'm still in a dark place, and I'm still mourning

It's been 48 hours without a call from you

Will I survive the next 48 without you?

Was hoping to spend the next 48years with you

So How dare you?

Stand the silence in between

I thought we were supposed to be twin

Be in tune with one another

Never forsake the other

Keep the love and keep the order

Keep this heart in the palm of the other

But this heart, I can feel it's muscles weaken

Each pump reducing slowly in its beating

The shock from lack of blood from all the previous bleeding

Trying hard to stop itself from giving in

If this heart stopped would I still have a reason to live?

Cause I put it my all and all I could give

And all I could give you was care and love

But it seemed like I did too much and exceeded enough

Would you please not be a bird and not fly off?

If you said yes

Would it make difference?

If you said no, I wouldn't really know the difference

In the expressions

I'll pick you, thumb to ink you in every emotional election

We've drawn Love & battle lines

Would it matter though?

I have fought for this with a piece of red clothing like a matador

I barely scrapped through and almost got gored

Looked up to the heavens, palms up and called God

Creeping through the fine heart fibers, I got lured

This shouldn't be happening again dear lord!

Now, I am in a room thinking and wondering

Wondering if there is anything left worth saving

Thinking of the rights words that I am not saying

Thinking about nothing and everything

Everything that could be and never be

Because the future cannot be seen

Seen through this blurred lenses

Maybe my refractory vision needs correcting

From all experiences that I have been collecting

Hoping that someday what I did wasn't neglecting

Neglecting the best thing that life had in store

Maybe then this heart won't be sore

From hoping that we could have been more

But we both know all too well that

Love doesn't live here anymore

So, as my emotional curtains falls like a clast

As the words roll up to reveal the cast

With the mind flat lining looking back to the past

Made me realize we were never built to last

E.L.R.A.J