NORTH Lyrics

Yeah

It's that time of year I'm going out to clear the deck

Stashing the patio set busting my rear end

This table's too big can someone help me lift it up? Quick?

Mother f*** these chair legs bruised my shins up

Eight Day's showing a graphic of snowflake

Time for some widespread panic across the whole state (Oh great)

No parking at the store, I make my own space

Ain't a single loaf of bread up in the whole place (Whole grain)

There's no water to be found not even OJ

But I got a lotta balls like I store the croquet

Swiping Aquafina out your cart while you're not lookin'

Throwing in some chicken noodle soup and straight bookin'

Calling up the wife (Get me in the back alley)

I'm cold like Doug E. Doug at the Olympics up in Calgary

Long winter ahead, no choice but to succumb bruh

So cold hitchhikers hold up pictures of a thumbs up

Welcome to the North…

Cancellations

Stores… Stores are chaos

Snowplow knocking down your mailbox

Wel-Welcome… the North

Ro-R-Road Closures

P-P-Polar… Vortex

In the North all business as usual

You get this in the South you'll be planning your funeral

It's nightfall throw that Yule log on fast

The snow bank's keeping the beer colder than Rudolph's ass

Got my snowblower ready for this Bombogenesis

So I'm casually depositing the snow over your fence

Pivot around and we got like eight inches more

I think we pissed off Mother Nature 'cause she just ate the porch

This is torture, can't see, goggles got frosted

Ice lodged under my pants around my Bob 'Crotch-it'

'Tis the season I'm supposed to act like Jolly Ol' Cole

But this winter's got me feeling like I'm probably old, so

A Snow Day's synonymous with 'locked in own home'

The shovel turns strong men into hobbling old folks

Take off my snow pants man I'm done with the weather

Sorry 'bout the shrinkage hun but it should fit you much better

After 10:00 it's time to get some things bouncing

No snow inside but I'm still upstairs plowing

Welcome to the North…

Power Outages

C-Col-Colder than Rudolph's ass

Put-Putting on chains

Lower back pain… pain

North…

Wel-Wel-Welcome to the Nor…

Snow-Snow... pocalypse

In the North all business as usual

You get this in the South you'll be planning your f… planning your funeral

The winter is upon us

Get snug and warm and cozy