The Ex-Could-Have-Been Song Lyrics

I had a crush on this boy one time

He was a bit older, he was a bit fine

But he was a tad flakey and he wasn't all mine

Oh I had a crush on that boy one time

JJ!

Had a thing for this fella uptown

He liked to sing and dance and he'd show me around

The last time I saw him he said 'see ya soon!

But now I'm all alone just a singin' this tune

Bram!

I had an escapade with this guy abroad

He was a bit older, he was way fine

He drank a lot of liquor and could carry his wine

I think I still like this Belgian man of mine

Libby!

Had a thing for this girl, she could fiddle

Never really knew her, well maybe just a little

I saw her one time on stage, she was singing

And from then on, well my heart was a ringin

Mariano!

Once kissed a boy on a boat, he was shy

He wasn't very old and he wasn't very smart

He wasn't very tall and he never filled the part

But hey, I saw him lookin' and I knew love was a cookin

Bob!

Fell in love with a boy from afar

I never even knew him but he left a scar

I never even knew him and I'll never ever show him

Fell in love with a boy named Bob from afar

Stan!

Met one time with this bloke in New York City

He was real smart and he was real pretty

We got along swell but my timing was hell

So I sent a long message cause I knew that I should end it

Jake!

Did some yoga with my friend from New Jersey

Met him at church camp, man what a doozy

He wasn't real tall but I knew he was great

I think I'll always love him, damn this is fate

Lem!

Spent some time with guy that I worked with

He stole some wine and suggested that we drink it

I thought we were pals but he wouldn't let go of my hand

Oh boy, I forgot, he's a man

Dan!

Dated this dude named Dan for a minute

He had long hair and on the 'gram he would kill it

We went to the movies and he chatted me up

Man I think I am done with this stuff

Oliver!

Hated this boy from Ocean City

He played lots of music, it sounded pretty shitty

His hair was dreamy and his eyes did shine

Jesus, I'm glad he never was mine

Will!

Went to dinner with guy from an app

He wasn't real tall, he had lots of fun facts

Didn't say much about himself as a person

But he'd let me know about his health and if it would worsen

David!

Met this Canadian boy on the tube

He was real tall, we had on matching shoes

But when it came time for us to part

Knew we wouldn't make it, boy what a start

Baptiste!

Had some drinks with a boy from France

He was my height and his pants were tight

I didn't wanna answer his text the next day

He decided that I threw him away

Jimmy!

Once liked this guy who came from a berry

He played lots of music, he was kinda hairy

But when it came time to seal the deal

Had to jump ship, this love wasn't real

Had a crush on this boy one time

He was a bit older, he was a bit fine

But he was a tad flakey and he wasn't all mine

Oh I had a crush on that boy one time