What If Lyrics

When all you know is how to be alone

You never get used to things coming together

Suicidal thoughts only thing playin in my mind

It's hard not to be dark when you don't know how to shine

Everybody lookin at you like you got it all made

Until you find yourself behind the doors that's keeping you safe

Secluded from the world I'm reunited with peace

No drug addiction could separate me long enough to not see

All the pressure from what's expected everyone even me

Until my time is expired I will introduce you to me

He always felt alone when accompanied by a group

Nobody spoke so he never spoke that's the everyday move

I mean it had to be normal, nobody made a complaint

And so we're born with a voice and choose to have nothing to say

Too much time can be dangerous, especially by yourself

It's easy feeding your demons when you never knew there was help

That's when he looked in the mirror, then headed out for his day

His mother rushes to the door with a bagged lunch yelling wait!

Taking the long way to school to even out all the plans

Thinking when it's said and done I won't have to do this again

Thinking back on the bullies, and all the people just watching

They getting treated exactly the same, the reason I'm plotting

The chances of this, not going according to plan

Resembles someone thinking this not a instrument in my hand

Anyone tryna stop me, can get the title of hero

I'm making rounds till I'm empty bodies exceeding two zeros

Worse come to worst, I'll end my life where I stand

I'll make my way through the gates before they put the time on my head

If I don't then they won't, they probably want me to live

My punishment is for me to live so I can see what I did

From the street that I'm on, I could hear the first bell

I know I'm late but I'm early to do what I said without fail

I started crossing the street, I hear a car slam on breaks

The school crossing guard yelling you didn't hear me tell you to wait!?

I proceed to the street, my destination in front

No second guessing it's not like I had somebody I trust

It's time to make em all pay, do what I said from the start

It shouldn't take a massacre to see who's holding a heart

I make it up all the stairs, then I open the door

Entering school for the last time now you just watch me perform

Should I start with the office, the principle never cared

He always acted so cool like he wanted to be all our friends

Nah

Ima start with my classroom, cause they the first on the list

Then ima work my way through the halls give me less than five minutes

Ima walk right in class, then ima head to the back

And I hope somebody speak on me being late for that class

As I open the door, I see a woman inside

Standing where I usually sit, she couldn't help but to smile

She handed me a bagged lunch, a kiss and then on her way

Before she left the classroom, I had to stop her ma wait!

I gave her my bag, in exchange for my lunch

Just when I thought no one cared, she stood there right there in front

Those who have listened to this story would've thought

This was being told from the eyes of a white male

What if it wasn't?

Both suicide, and homicide have no color. feelings of solitude can be prevented

Just speak, Let's talk about it