80's Dad Lyrics

Why am I driving across the state at five:00AM

For a nonstop weekend travel baseballl tournament

Why can't we keep sports in the seasons of the past

Maybe I was born to parent when life didn't move so fast

I wanna be an 80's dad

I wouldn't be caught dead in a minivan

Free from the tyranny of Instagram

No need to document how perfect we are

I'd swoop right in

To give a bedside pep talk to my kids

Piano softly playing

Problem's fixed

Well that's how I remember it

When being a parent wasn't hard

Cleanup time would just consist of toys thrown in the trash

Winning tickets at my kid's Chuck E. Cheese birthday bash

You broke your arm a bit

Just go rub some dirt on it

I'd never change a diaper

I'd barely know where my kid is

I wanna be an 80's dad

I wouldn't be caught dead in a minivan

Free from the tyranny of Instagram

No need to document how perfect we are

I'd swoop right in

To give a bedside pep talk to my kids

Piano softly playing

Problem's fixed

Well that's how I remember it

When being a parent wasn't hard

Everyone doesn't have to be a winner

I'll let you starve if you don't like dinner

Emotionally available as a speed bump

Fearsomely enforce the rules

Beat Super Mario like a superhero

Raising free range children who get it done

I wanna be an 80's dad

Cause I didn't turn to be all that bad

I hope you can fail and learn to bounce right back

And grow from your mistakes without a YouTube tutorial

You'll love the great outdoors

Cause you'll be locked out til dinner and not a moment before

You'll know the worth of working every chore

The evidence is plain to see

They knew what they were doing in the 80's