Rusty and Crusty Lyrics

When did it happen

How can it be

It feels like yesterday

I could stand when I pee

It doesn't make sense

That my bones makin' creaks

But every time I stand

I let out a shriek

AAHHHHH

I can't see anymore

Or really hear anything

I'm one good fart away

From shattering my spleen

Looks like I've become rusty and crusty

My body's a temple

But it's condemned and dusty

I used to be steel

Now I'm brittle as glass

Try to stand tall

But I fall on my ass

Football star

High school prom king

Now my balls are draggin'

Like cans on a string

Ooooo It's sometimes good

It's not all bad

I've got lots of free time

And someone else wipes my ass

I've traded my throne

For a squeaky old chair

Now when I sneeze

I shit myself and it tears

Looks like I've become rusty and crusty

My body's a relic

Ancient and musty

Living each day

Like I'm about to meet death

But I'm still here dancing

Though I'm short of breath

Guitar solo

Rusty and Crusty

You'll be there someday

You'll scare little children

And scared of the music they play

Grumbling at gadgets

That get in your way

Complaining that things aren't made

Like back in your day