The House of Caesar Lyrics

Back in 44 BC

The republic was run by Julius C

The senate was worried he'd be king

So Brutus had to do something

Calling him a tyrant

He must die for his crimes

So they met him in the senate

Stabbed him 18 times

He muttered Et tu brute

Then Caesar went down

A civil war broke out

Who'd end up with the crown

His great nephew Octavian

Is now Caesar's son

A decision that left

Mark Antony stunned

It's another civil war

They tried to settle it

Teaming up to be the

Second triumvirate

The peace couldn't last

There could only be one

Then Antony loses at

At the battle of Actium

Now Octavian ruled

Like a striding colossus

So bow if you please

He's emperor Augustus

[chorus]

He ruled an Empire

The Roman Empire

From the shores of the Rhine

To the Hills of Palestine

All hail Augustus, God of Rome

Augustus ruled the empire

For forty one years

But he had a tough time

Locking down his heirs

Agrippa, Marcellus

They dropped like flies

Lucius, Gaius

Posthumus exiled

Then Augustus was dead

Poisoned pear from his wife

Who can say? either way

Its the end of his life

With no more Julian brats

Alive To raise a fuss

The throne goes to Livia's

grumpy son Tiberius

He ruled an Empire

The Roman Empire

From the shores of the Rhine

To the Hills of Palestine

All hail Tiberius, Emperor of Rome

Tiberius in charge

But his number one man is

A Praetorian Prefect

By the name of Sejanus

Sejanus poisons Drussus

Who doesn't recover

Now it's Sejanus who's dead

his daughter takes a lover

Tiberius was unloved

A bitter old coot

When it came to succession he'd

Give Rome a little boot

His nephew held the pillow

Til the breathing stopped

Good riddance to Tiberius

Caligula's on top

He ruled an Empire

The Roman Empire

From the shores of the Rhine

To the Hills of Palestine

All hail Caligula, Party king of Rome

Caligula was just 24

Beloved by the people

But the wealthy elite began to ask

Is this guy kind of evil?

Did he make love to his sisters

Or make a senator of his horse

Did legionaries steal sea shells

From Britain's rocky shores

So They killed Caligula

Said his brain was sick

The senate wanted to

Restore the Republic

But the praetorian guards

Weren't down with this plan

How bout this old fool

Aye, Claudius was their man

He ruled an Empire

The Roman Empire

From the shores of Rhine

To the Hills of Palestine

All hail Claudius, Puppet king of Rome

Claudius had grown up

Stuttering and weak

His family dismissed him

As a drooling geek

He had written history

Now he had a chance to make it

He saw the Britons' sceptered isle

It was time for Rome to take it

He strengthened Roman borders

His public games were a corker

He's the only emperor

To take down an Orca

But His fourth wife Agrippina

Thought her son should be the hero

She poisoned poor old Claudius

Hail emperor Nero

He ruled an Empire

The Roman Empire

From the shores of the Rhine

To the Hills of Palestine

All hail Nero, the beast of Rome

Did he make love to his sisters

Make a senator of his horse

Did legions steal sea shells

From Britain's rocky shores

So They killed Caligula

Said his brain was sick

The senate wanted to

Restore the Republic

The praetorian guards

Weren't down with this plan

How bout this old fool (Aye)

Claudius was their man

He ruled an Empire

The Roman Empire

From the shores of Rhine

To the Hills of Palestine

All hail Claudius, God of Rome

Claudius had grown up

Stuttering and weak

His family dismissed him

As a drooling geek

He had written history

Now he had a chance to make it

He saw the Britons' sceptered isle

Time for Rome to take it

He strengthened Roman borders

His public games a corker

And he's the only emperor

To execute an Orca

But His fourth wife Agrippina

Thought her son should be the hero

She poisoned poor old Claudius

All hail emperor Nero

He ruled an Empire

The Roman Empire

From the shores of Rhine

To the Hills of Palestine

All hail Nero, the Beast of Rome

Nero was an emperor like no other

He killed his wife

His Step-brother

And Agrippina his mother

Fire! Fire! Fire!

Took out a chunk of the city

If the Christians get blamed

That's such a pity

Nero couldn't last

He made too many foes

Killed by Epaphroditus

That's just the way it goes

His blood trickled into

The wine faced sea

There goes the last of the

Julio Claudian dynasty

They ruled an Empire

The Roman Empire

Augustus, Tiberius

Nero, Caligula and Claudius

The end of Julio Claudian dynasty

They ruled an Empire

The Roman Empire

From the shores of Rhine

To the Hills of Palestine

Farewell to Caesar's dynasty