Toasted Lyrics

Life's not quite what I thought it'd be

Thought I'd be better off by 23

And maybe that's partially on me

Thought I'd have it all figured out

Crack a joke and tear the whole world down

And maybe I wasn't thinking realistically

But its all starting to change

Got a feeling so strange

Maybe im just getting older

And it making me bolder

I stuck my dick in a toaster

Then I plugged into the wall

My confidence is bolstered

But my balls are burning small

And I tried to get it out but it was just no use at all

I put my dick in a toaster

That was my greatest downfall

Life's not quite what I thought it'd be

An ER for my burning meat

And maybe that's totally on me

[but please]

Now I gotta tell the ER nurse

Might as well call me a hearse

And that part is totally on me

But it's starting to really burn

I guess I'll just never learn

Maybe I'm just getting dumber

To use my dick as a plunger

I stuck my dick in a toaster

Then I plugged into the wall

My confidence is bolstered

But my balls are burning small

And I tried to get it out but it was just no use at all

I put my dick in a toaster

That was my greatest downfall

So take a lesson from me

I need you all to know

Being a lesbian is the only thing that saved me

Cuz my dick is silicone

I stuck my dick in a toaster

Then I plugged into the wall

My confidence is bolstered

But my balls are burning small

And I tried to get it out but it was just no use at all

I put my dick in a toaster

That was my greatest downfall