Glad To Be Alive Lyrics

I've only been home a few weeks and I can't help but speaking about you everyday

I've been tellin tales of our days and our plans up through May but I think I'm talking you away

Its my birthday and I've been missing you today

Been smoking clove cigarettes that I bought when you went missing

I think I'll be a smoker til they're gone

Been moving through the death of a childhood best friend

Watching my mother process loss

Been feeling so sorry, not quite sure what that's about

I've been thinking about my life

Counting on my hands all that I've got right

I've been holding onto hope

Letting myself love what I love most

Even if I'm not happy

I can still be glad to be alive

You said "it was just like a dream, a far too distant spring"

Haven't heard from you in 3 weeks

You said "come to me we'll spin our favorite CDs

And you can tell me everything"

I wish I wouldn't have believed you

Oh now we're coming up to spring

I've been thinking about my life

Counting on my hands all that I've got right

I've been holding onto hope

Letting myself love what I love most

Even if I'm not happy

I can still be glad to be alive

I woke up today, 27 and so afraid

Opened my blinds up anyways

Picked up my old guitar didn't get very far

Before I cried for yesterday

Found myself thinkin of dyin but then I tried to have a good day

I've been thinking about my life

Counting on my hands all that I've got right

I've been holding onto home

Letting myself love who I love most

Even though I'm not happy

I am so glad to be alive

I know someday I'll be happy

Until then just stay alive

I fell in with a stranger for the 3rd time this year

And I ghost my sister each time they disappear

And I know that I've been a bad friend

I've been fighting myself just to want to be here

I've been sleeping so bad and I've been holding back tears

And I don't know why it's so hard

To be a person out here

I'm gonna live my life with an open heart to my fears

I'm gonna love so hard it's like I'm not even here

Cause I know that I, I don't wanna die yet

So I'll keep giving all these strangers all my favorite songs

I'm gonna lose myself each time I fall in love

With someone I don't know

But I won't lose hope that I'm meant for someone