HOPE Lyrics

I put a blade to my wrist and envision the slits

But I been too much of a bitch

Focus on everything hurting me, making me sick

Too overdramatic to fix

I been a bit of an addict

I wish I could have it

Beginning to shudder and twitch

Wish I could have her

Cuz I been enamored

It matters not

Whether i keep existing or rot

How does it feel

Knowing that moment is real

Hoping to cope but you kill

Everything loved

You know she wanted you still

But you only gave her the shove

You wanna be happy and had it

But threw it away cuz of something so minimally problematic

She actually cared, but you're not aware

I don't wanna love again, heart is impaired

Now I'm awake in the cold of December alone

I'd take you to hold but you aint in my phone

Dream of the way she would smile

I haven't been back in that place in a while

I used to dream about you with my last name

Now the past aint seeming fair

I used to dream about us with our backs turned to the hate

Now you aint there

See that without her I been feeling numb

Keep holding back all the truth from my tongue

Cuz even if i needed that to be spilled

I threaten to have our relation be killed

Amazingly thrilled

Then overly cry

I feel like emotions I feel aren't mine

Cuz its all a mess when I think of our time

To love or to hate as if I could decide

Hope you and I

End up together in all other lives

Even that one has never been mine

If we ever had it I hope its alive

Even for me I still wanna retry

Down for whenever, it cant be a crime

I feel the panic or maybe its cope

But deep in my brain is delusion of hope