Anxious Lyrics

I sit with my thoughts i try to take action

I wanna take part in the love and attraction

But i worry of dissatisfaction

So i keep quiet as i fear their reaction

I have words in my head but speak none

Show myself to the world but i'm undone

I succumb anxiety's gun and i feel like a hostage

Feeling so stunned

I anticipate only the worst

An unlikealbe person a burden it hurts

And wish i could narrate words in emotion of happy

But sadly i learned

Hatred i feel for myself it is staggering

Capture the reasons i feel i'm unflattering

Gather the fractured means of imagining

Not to be dead but instead to be happy

But i can't be

And feeling the pain isn't worth it, entrap me

I'm uncharismatic it's quite cinematic

I want to dethrone that i feel i'm unhappy

And i wan't to be loved and be cherished

But the doubt in myself won't perish

And i wan't talk but i won't with laws

They tell i will end up embarrassed

Classic, uncourageous

An unthinkable fear to be judged so outrageous

I tail in the hope that i know i'll forsake

When i flee and abandoned audacious

With the risk i'm disliked my behavior on trail

When i try to enact i'm unable

Yet i ache to belong i'm enthralling in fault

I'm in need of a savoir an angel

I fear that they want me to leave them alone

I feel like i have nothing to offer

I write of hope that i do not know

So i know i cannot be the author

I don't feel i'm enough but they just won't hush

I'm wrought in despair it's torture

I abide to thought i'm unworthy love

And for that i cannot move forward

I'm so broken, i don't want go unspoken

I wanna find laughter and friends to be close with

And to feel like i'm for cared and noticed

I wanna be surrounded with lovely emotion

To fit in with no need to be cautious

I don't wanna be another background story

With the opportunities I've seen fallen

And all the memories i never took part in

My avoidance of chances of failure endanger

I starve of endearments remainder

I feel weak and with fear as a painter

The ruler of art and a master engraver

With regret as brush and inadequate thoughts

I surrender to the pain i was taught

And i know it records all i ever do wrong

And then use it against it's awful

I fear that they want me to leave them alone

I feel like i have nothing to offer

I write of hope that i do not know

So i know i cannot be the author

I don't feel i'm enough but they just won't hush

I'm wrought in despair it's torture

I abide to thought i'm unworthy love

And for that i cannot move forward