I Can't Follow Lyrics

You told me I need to let go

I got demons that won't, leave me alone, they all needed a home

Proceeded to go, to breach in my dome

They want to see me get choked, they'll put a knee to my throat

Or bleed out slow, with a thousand pointy needles and poke

Hit me at my weakest of lows

To a condition, that made me want to reach for chrome, become a ghost

But feeded what I needed to know

To make a dying light, to my own, beacon of hope, because

You told me I need to let go

Throw away everything I know

Let, go, of control

But, I, can't follow

You told easily I need to

Be me, freely

Why don't you see?

You make fun of mental health but after this you'll switch your dialect

Cause time and time I stress when suicide pops in my mind again

But if choose to off myself I promise you'll be dying next

So take a look inside my head and take you're final breathe

Cause' as a man, have you ever looked your loved ones in their eyes?

When they're more than well aware that you've been suffering inside

In a psych-ward cause you tried to jump down up from a such height

That if you landed you would crumble through your spine

Psychiatrist and doctors give you medicine that numb you out your mind

It's weird the more your take's the more that you don't want to be alive

And you hate it when mother hides her struggles with a smile

But you busted her disguise like undercover FBI

I'm not looking for no pity no matter how bad it gets

Problems made a damaged head that turned me to a catatonic mannequin

But carried it with styled chariots and heart on my sleeve

Seen as weak but those who judge, have no fashion sense

Thoughts I was getting, had my torso compressing

With a torturing tension with many sorts of aggression

At first they were schooling me like they taught me a lesson

But formed it to a formula that turned a flaw to a blessing

My mind was a battlefield and my fortress was stressing

In a corner and sweating, on the floor with no weapon

Bought a soldier to come out who fought when called to attention

Came out a veteran the way I fight this war with depression even if

You told me I need to let go

Throw away everything I know

Let, go, of control

But, I, can't follow

You told easily I need to

Be me, freely

Why don't you see?