3AM Thoughts Lyrics

3am I'm laying in my bed awake

I'm scared to close my eyes and let my conscience fade

Force every part of me not to let myself think

Or slip away into the line between real and sleep

I'm scared to death but it gets worse in my dreams

I keep having nightmares about everyone leaving

Feel like I'm losing everyone at once

Replay the memories till I can't feel at all

I keep having these thoughts, I'm in an empty hall

Candle lit and gorgeous but it's windy and hollow

Every windows open no one's here at all

It's like the perfect moment but no one shares this awe

Have you ever stood on the beach 6am watching the sun

It rises out the water takes your eyes a minute to adjust

Magical and you can't explain it in words

Imagine having no one to share the experience with

Dying is my biggest fear but not death, more being in pain or what comes next

Im so scared the things I've done aren't for the best

What if after life on earth I suffer eternally

And what if everyone I know dies before me

Wanna live forever never want anything to change

Paralyzed I can't move I'm fighting with my brain

I'm so scared to take a path that leads me to more pain

So now it's 3am and I'm wide awake

I don't feel like a person and I really can't explain

I can't breathe feels like I'm losing my mind

The paralyzing fear of being lonely my whole life

What if everyone who loves me decides to change their minds

What if I never reach the dreams that keep me alive

What if I never find someone that wants to stay by my side

If I bet all I have on love will they stay this time

I'm so scared I won't be happy and they'll laugh in my face

They're gonna call me a failure another waste of space

I bet everything I had on all my dreams

And some of them I'm worried I'll never achieve

There's some people I know I should leave for the better

No one's treated me worse like ever

But I'm scared if I lose them then will I regret it

I'm scared to move forward cause to the past I'm so tethered

It's a feeling of familiarity and it's fading

And I'll do anything to feel that way again

So I hold onto the past like it's all I have but then

I can't do what's right for me cause I'm so scared to forget

Feel like I ruin everything and now I hold myself back

Scared to make something worse so I won't take any steps

I know I should reach out try to grab that star

I never used to think what if it's too far

Always been a go getter never sat and observed

But sometimes I feel like misery is all I deserve

My thoughts won't shut up tell me I could make it worse

I know I need to move on and let go of what hurts

But I'd rather live in pain and feel what's familiar