State of Mind Lyrics

I never open up like this to anybody

Try to keep the pain within but its unbearable

I love my momma more then anything

But shit you cannot fathom

All the trauma that I'm going through when I put up a front

I want a peace of mind

I wanna live a life without the fear of dealing with a drunk

Whos constantly insulting me

A mother fucker, lazy peice of shit,

A stupid worthless bitch

And I aint even scratch the list

Its really hard for me to say this

As I'm writing on this song

I hear her banging on the walls

Banging on the glass

Trynna get attention

I don't know how I'm reseliant to all the noise

Growing up to screaming did a number on her voice

Always blaming everything on me

When all I ever did was try to be the best of me

At the age of 9

Seeing all the coke

Dealing with the drinking

While I'm hiding trying to cope

I don't know if I can handle anymore

Doing everything I can to grow and move up out the house

Praying up to god

Wanna make it out

Why the fuck am I the one whos gotta pick up all the peices

Every single fucking night alone

I wish I grew up in another home

I wanna fly away

Live another day

I got a son to raise

Never being led astray

Growing up without a father

Dealing with a trauma

Havving zero guidance

Getting into trouble

Giving in to violence

Fucked me up

Man I don't wanna live like that

I wanna set a good example for the youth

Be the father you can come to after school

Having dinner with the fam

Making memories and being proud about your past

I got alot to learn

And I am just beginning

Doing everything I can to make a fucking living

Learning from my past

Never gonna live like that

Ima be the dad that I aint never had