Becoming Lyrics

I always tried to be a good guy

The yes ma'am, no ma'am kind

But I got rage that nobody knows but me

34 ain't what I pictured

I fake a smile and say I'm grateful

But sometimes, no

I'm pissed and I'm tired and I'm alone

Maybe I should learn to finally let go

I've been chasing dreams since 14

Fueled by nicotine and caffeine

And a hole in my heart that I can't seem to heal

Maybe it's because I hate sitting still

But I've been trying

Maybe I should slow it down

But what would happen then

I need control so I keep running

Maybe I should let my life unfold just as it is

But I'm afraid to know

Who I'm becoming

I'm often pulled into my old ways

And it's familiar so I stay

'Cause I get sick of the healing sometimes

And I just wanna live my damn life

Sometimes it all becomes a cliché

The mindfulness, the namaste

I got demons I sweep under rugs

That remind me of who I once was

Maybe I should slow it down

But what would happen then

I need control so I keep running

Maybe I should let my life unfold just as it is

But I'm afraid to know

Who I'm becoming

I miss the old me sometimes

The drunken dreamer with stars in his eyes

But the future is a trap and I'm slowly learning that

But the past is hard to redefine

Maybe I should slow it down

and learn to feel my pain

I won't lock it away, it's meant for something

I can't heal what I can't feel

So give me all the rain

And I'll learn to face, at a slow and steady pace

Who I'm becoming