The Singleton Parish Meeting At The Village Hall Lyrics

Welcome to the Singelton Parish meeting June 25th

In attendance is chair Alistair Wycombeshire Smith

Vice chair Burton Henry and his wife Sue the clerk

If you all now take your seat we can get to work

The minutes from the previous meeting have been read and signed

Furthermore Timothy Shaw has agreed to stay behind

He will stack the chairs and keep them in the vestry

I'd like to thank his wife Millie for bringing cake and tea

Sue has spoken to the police about Ivy Street

To deter the cosh boys who have chosen there to meet

Sergeant Heard has had a word with the vandal's mums

If they continue they've all been promised Claret bums

We've received a quote from Bill to fix the church's roof

He's asked for fifty pounds to ensure it's waterproof

But our budget's stretched so please bring your pots and pans

And Reverend Stanis will have to do the best he can

Now for any new business

Please form an orderly queue

And at the next Singelton parish meeting

We'll do the best that we can do

Mrs Critchley wants her husband's ban overturned

From this year's vegetable show she says his lessons learned

The sorrow for crushing Brian's marrow is honest and sincere

He's offered paying reparations if you let him compete this year

Mr Hunt wants the committee to commit to recompense

For the damage caused when Barry's walls fell down and broke his fence

He realises denies were made but found it rather odd

That's Barry Picking's kicking walls is considered an act of God

I know I'm late but can I bake my famous lemon drizzle cake

And sell it just to raise some funds to help the war widowed mums

It's been six years since they were cursed their misery has gotten worse

And no one seems to want to help them

If there is no further business

Meeting ended nine forty two

And the next Singelton parish meeting

We'll do the best that we can do