Where I'm Going Lyrics

I've been doing music since 2007

I think that's when I made my first beat ever in GarageBand

After making seven of them

I exported the seventh one

And I put a shitty low-quality picture

Of a Lamborghini behind it in iMovie

Which I don't know why I did that

The depression only got worse after 2017

But I felt like my music got stronger

I mean, I even got to do like, a passion project

With childhood heroes of mine

And my music was actually in front of people

For like the first time ever

Like, no more, like, uploading my music

And it's just zero views

After like three months

And like if you Google my name

It actually pops up

It's not just some shitty, like, tool company

That no one's ever heard of

And I don't know, that just

That feels cool to me

That was a goal

But, I saw a lot of negative

About me, though

It was really overwhelming

It made me want to quit

I mean, just like one comment alone

About how I ruined my own album

Had over 100 likes behind it

That's like a gymnasium of 100 people

Just shaking their head "no" at me all at once

And that wasn't the only one like that

That made it hard to want to keep going

But the people around me

Told me to keep focusing on the good

And there was a lot of good still

Like, lots of love

So, from now on, that's what I'm doing

My depression is another thing, though

I left it unchecked for far too long

Definitely before 2017, I was depressed

Now, it's 2023, and I'm worse

I've self-harmed myself more times than I can count

And I've been watching myself decline

From inside the bottle while trying to read the label

That has to be so scary and unfair

For everybody around me

But, like, I'm working on it

I promise, like day by day

Every time I brush my teeth

Or every time I decide to actually get out of bed

Even just standing up to throw a piece of trash away

I'll make a mountain out of trash

I've thrown away to stand on

And I just hope that I won't be buried under it in my bed

I'm constantly looking for new reasons to be okay

And I know I've already found a few