The Ballad of Dick Thadunkins Lyrics

Hey I'm the detective who was assigned to this case

Hey man what's up

My name's Dick Thadunkins

I'm the detective Dick Thadunkins

Ah, Dick the Dunkins, huh?

Dick the Dunkins?

No no no no no it's Dick Thadunkins

Oh, my mistake

Dick Thadunkins

Got it

It's a sharp T-H

Yeah man my mistake

It's not a soft T-H

Alright man, alright

Dick Thadunkins

Yup, my mistake man, my mistake

It's the one that yeah ok

Ok

Anyway

I'm so fucking sorry to hear about what happened to the Tungsten King

He's the one who hired me

Oh me too, man, it's been a

Anyway

(Ok)

I'm here with my best officer

Uh Wendy

What's your name

I'm Wendy Capicola

That's right, Wendy Gabagool

Wendy Gabagool

Capicola

Alright

Officer Gabagool

Anyway

We're here to chase after the horrible Heebie Jeeber

You came too late

Where did he go?

He went out the secret escape

I don't even know where it is

Oh shit

I don't even know where the secret escape is

Oh fuck

He must be somewhere in the back

Alright, well we can take a look around

Don't worry about it

Don't worry, we'll take a look around

Do we have any I.D. on where he's from?

(No)

Need to figure out who this Heebie Jeeber is, I know he's

Hey I've got a piece of information that might help you out

(Oh ok)

(Oh tell us what it is, oh)

Actually, I think I'll keep it to myself

I have a score to settle with Mr. Jeeber

Ok well I'm gonna go look for the secret escape

You two have fun

I'm gonna do the important job now

Hey Mr. Tantalum King

Yeah man

I'm a big fan of your kingdom

Oh thanks man

Will you sign my badge?

Oh uh sure man

Will you sign my badge?

Yeah man, sure I'll sign your badge

You got a Sharpie marker or something?

Oh wait a minute I just got a page from Wendy

She found the escape

Well you better make haste and make chase

And don't make any mistakes

And fucking kill Heebie Jeeber I hate that guy

Okay

He killed my brother

Alright man I'm out

Alright