Wheebing's Theme Lyrics

There was once a man

A very important man let's call him Wheebing

Now

Nobody quite cared for this man or even knew he existed

Until one day he wrapped himself all up in aluminum foil and became a nuclear bomb

The detonation killed trillions

The location, a seaside resort in Sawpit Colorado

Home to other important men such as Guillermo

The loss of these men's lives, among the thirty three.four trillion other humans in the Area, resulted In a galactic catastrophe of unfathomable proportions

Yes you heard me right

Darth Vader has nothing on this

Sucker Emcee

Anyways, back to the evening news

This same Wheebing man, Once described by his lover as

Indomitable as a goliath, but with the feet of a ballet dancer

Take no risks you can't lose

Take no risks, with a rude fool

Are you in or are you out

Wheebing's going to make you shout

With his grimy hands and knees

Eating bowls of sand and fleas

Dirty schemes with dirty minds

Wheebing's spout has gone up dry

Take no risks, you can't lose

Take no risks with a rude fool

Are you in or are you out

Wheebing's going to make you shout

Living out the father's sin

Killing native colonies

We will make you cream and make you scream

From Wheebing's secret evil dreams

Wheebing will be getting in your head

Slit your throat and you'll know you're dead

Even if can survive that attack

He will flip you over and stab you in the back

He's stolen the bones

From all the dinos of old

He keeps a secret you see

The secrets of a baby

The baby holds the key

Past the door, you will find

Among the bastard surprise

The finest juice and wine

Take no risks, you can't lose

Take no risks with a rude fool

Are you in or are you out

Wheebing's going to make you shout

Musky rat with no hair

Ghouls and goblins everywhere

Tearing down, walls, so thin

Wheebing's going to eat your kids

Many people

They despise the wheebster

Stupid dummies can't tell meat from cleaver

Shooting bullets and put it in a geezer

Got knocked out, woke up in his freezer

He's stolen the bones

From all the dinos of old

He keeps a secret you see

The secrets of a baby

The baby holds the key

Past the door you will find

Among the bastard surprise

The finest juice and wine