Samuel Godinho Lyrics

My name is Samuel Godinho I was born under the full moon

Nocturnal spirit but the day has passed too soon

I don't think I really got a chance to live my childhood

Always focused on the next thing and always what I could do

In my life but I'm only twenty-three yet it feels like

I've been alive for centuries

My memory is gone and so are half the things that made me happy

Try to capture it in song but I don't wanna sound sappy

Nature versus Nurture don't know where I got sick from

But it's in my nature to be nurtured by bounds of endless love

I don't think that's asking much

But I feel I don't deserve it that's the funny thing because

I never do the hurting

I've been a victim more times than I ever told a lie

But I can't distinguish what is real and what's inside my mind

I've been losing touch for years and it's only getting worse but

I would do everything not to end up in a hearse

But before I go I wanna form some meaningful connections

A friendship where I don't have to actively suppress any parts

Of my persona

I'm scared of being real so I'd rather be a loner

Have you got the message yet

Struggle with duality so I can never be in check

Always flip-flopping never stable always in my head

Praying every night for when I don't sleep in an empty bed, well

I don't pray every night I mean I used too but

I'm looking for a different light and I love God but

He never helped me in this fight

Countless hours that I spent, screaming in the night

On my knees and begging for a big neon sign but

Maybe I was destined to go through this life blind

I guess it doesn't matter I'm used to being all alone

Samuel Godinho born another rolling stone look

Find a hundred different ways to say the same things

All my songs just talk about what this life brings which is

Depression, emptiness, rage and sins

All I really need to do is try and get a win

But even when I do will that happiness be temporary

Long lost at sea lonely are the visionaries

Everything I write about is rooted in my pain so

Once I get better what will there be left to say?

I guess I would just make my raps in a different way

But if inspiration's lightning know it never hits the same place

Women are my favorite muse but

They make me hop back on the booze

Life is better handled when you're so drunk you start to snooze

I wanna be soothed tired of being strong I wanna be moved

Fighting tooth and nail cause I don't wanna lose

Lose more than I've already lost

Squandered friendships when I was nothing more than moss

Threw away a good girl cause I wanted to be God and

My last name holds that power I feel like such a fraud

Years went away was it power that I sought?

Or am I just afraid that I can be easily bought?

I don't wanna be here I don't wanna rot

So I'm stuck in the middle between urges that I fought

And I'm crying by myself I am nothing more than lost

I'm lost

I'm looking for a way, to get out of my head

But the voices never stop tell me that I'm worth more if I'm dead

Only then will I be celebrated

I'll finally get my flowers, here lies Samuel the crooked man of hour

The taste that's on my tongue is sour

Like I should limp away and cower

You've seen through my facade and you've seen the real me and

It was nice to meet you cause knowing me just ruins me

You realize that I'm twisted, I'm broken, maybe I can't be fixed

Imma try anyways cause why would I exist?

There's nothing more to life it's just a never ending trip

You live a happy life and still be gone in just a blip so

Why should you resist cause

I don't wanna live an empty life saying

I wish and I've been left feeling remiss but

My name is Samuel Godinho I am petrified of death

I like to build bridges just to burn them in the end

And I'll cry over the ashes wishing I could make amends

When I did it to myself I know it's all my fault but it's okay cause

I know that everything falls, everything dies

So the trick is have a happy life I'm still figuring it out

But I know I'll find the light inside, I hope