equilibrium Lyrics

Listen to me now cause I know you'll be forgetting this

Vibing with these crowds but sometimes I be regretting it

Knowing you're not around gets to me, I can't be letting it

I take these pills, fall to the ground, I know there's no defending it

I close my eyes, cause I don't wanna see your ghost

I toast to lies, that I want to come true the most

I'm supposed to try, to open doors you made me close

But lows and highs, are all I've had since you left home

I live my life, but a part of me already died

I'm sick inside, but I got no tears that I can cry

I know you're right, gotta accept there's things I cannot fight

But I can't decide, thought I needed you to feel alive

And I know

You cannot be

The source of my equilibrium

You only wake my inner delirium

And I know

I cannot see

How you're slowly breaking down my interior

Make me turn on myself, mass hysteria

Yeah

Some things just aren't meant to be

Some things just fuck you mentally

But you know that you cannot leave

Cause all these burnt up love notes are the only trace of you and me

Let me take you back to 2012

All those nights spent learning how true love really felt

You felt right, got me high on expressing myself

I could care less if we were dead broke, having you was my wealth

Staying late after school, you were becoming my muse

Let my guard down, was a fool, thought I never could lose

My perception of myself the second I lost you

But you caught me off guard, told me that we were through

And so I became, a cold and soulless criminal

I'd steal and tame, the hearts of individuals

Then I'd break them and defame them, left them nothing but residuals

Wish I would've seen shit clearer, you were fucking up my visuals

And then we got back together, said forever

But I was too fucked up to know that things were so much better

So I fucked shit up between us, there was no way to redeem us

So I lost you yet another time, need morphine, intravenous

So now

I know

That you could never be

The source of my equilibrium

You only woke my inner delirium

Yeah, I know

Why I couldn't see

How you slowly broke down my interior

Made me turn on myself, mass hysteria

Yeah

Got me sick of feeling something

Got me sick of feeling nothing

Got me sick of buzzing on a feeling I know is never coming

So what's the point in all these hundreds

What's the point in feeling something

What's the point in feeling nothing

What's the point of buzzing on a feeling I know is never coming