If This Was Lyrics

Lately hate how I've been feeling

Laying in my bed, I'm looking at the ceiling

Wondering if I am dreaming

Can't believe that every night

I have demons to fight

Finding peace is not in sight

How could this be right

Voices that I have, are there to take me out

Feeding lies that I am safe, now I am full of doubt

Would you hear me if I screamed and shout?

I remember that day like it's yesterday

17th of June, I tried to take my life away

As I faded, I never thought to say

If this was my last day

What did I leave behind?

If this was my last breath

What's the last thing I said?

If this was my last day

Will I still have this pain?

If this was my last breath

Did I make things right?

This is my third chance at life

Moments leading up to that, I felt as though I could not fight

I took a look at my phone

I saw video that titled "PLEASE DON'T KILL YOURSELF"

Devil in my ear is yelling loud, so I passed up the help

I was feeling worthless, I was feeling useless

The night before that day, I heard a voice tell me I had no purpose

Told me no one loved me, and there's nothing left that I could give

Then it went to say

I promise, it don't matter if you died or if you live

If this was my last day

What did I leave behind?

If this was my last breath

What's the last thing I said?

If this was my last day

Will I still have this pain?

If this was my last breath

Did I make things right?

I remember saying

"I can't take this anymore!"

Face down in my pillow yelling

"WHAT AM I LIVING FOR?"

If no one told you today

You are loved, you are worth it

You matter, you're not alone

Keep fighting, your story isn't over

If this was my last day

What did I leave behind?

If this was my last breath

What's the last thing I said?

If this was my last day

Will I still have this pain?

If this was my last breath

Did I make things right?