Walk Me Around ft. Eric Price & Brandon Uranowitz Lyrics

"Walk me around!"

"Show me the world!"

"Feed me some food!

Well, if you insist                                                              

He always insists

I'm hardly ever in the mood

I need a drink

Perhaps a foot-rub

But that's not how things work where he's from

And tell me, who has the balls?

Since whenever he calls

Never fear, here I come!

"Walk me around"

"Show me the world!"

Go walk yourself!

He can't walk himself

He's only a dog

He grabs his leash from off the shelf

Using his teeth!

Can you believe it?

So, I won't say the creature's not skilled

But I can't help but wish

I instead bought a fish

I know! I'll have him killed

Dies irae! Dies illa!

Rest in peace, Sir Lancelot

Sometimes I called him Lancie

Lot, or sometimes Lut

Sometimes I called him Sir

Sometimes I called him Slut

Not exactly "Friends, Romans, countrymen," but he wasn't exactly Julius Caesar

And, of course, he's not dead

He's home, no doubt elated

For when that clock strikes six

Each need he has gets sated

Each need I have gets nix

I only get to

Walk him around!

Give him a life!

But what about mine?

He wants to be held

He wants to be loved

He wants to be licked where the sun doesn't shine

Well, so do I!

Except that last thing

Although, desperate times, who's to say?

What I'd give for a tryst

But the last thing I kissed

Was a bichon frisé

What if I long

For something more

Or something less

Two legs, not four

Something that can't be found

At the pound!

But 'til then, I'll walk around!

"Walk me around!"

Ha, walk me around!

"Ruff! Walk me around

And around

And around

And around

And around

And around

And around

And around!"