how it started... Lyrics
- Genre:Hip Hop & Rap
- Year of Release:2022
Lyrics
How it started? Tell you the truth can't even call it
Feeling my darkest emotions that I didn't bargained
Demons keep calling every time I'm nearly falling
Emotional target. That stopped me from ballin the hardest
Can't go out in public that's when I faced al my scarring
Swaying sideways they thought I was half retarded
I laugh that shit off even though it kinda harmed me
Anxiety as a kid now y'all niggas saying sorry
Been insecure since middle school but that's another story
I kept distancing myself and got everybody worried
When I was in that 8th floor ward I looked in to the walls
And had life or death choice and didn't know who to call
Now I'm thoughtless and far from flawless
And drinking so I can forget about the scarring
I swear the demons keep working on me the hardest
What else to do when you watching your life falling?
That's how it started for real
I'm gonna tell you how it really started
Felt like it started in first grade that's when I became an easy target
I got picked on and called out. Was like the odd kid out
And my great aunt was the only one that I called on it about
That's why me and my aunt is so close to each other
Felt like the black sheep and I was disappointing my mother
But at the time I need acceptance from my family
Cause I got other relatives that was being damned at me
And since my mama died part of me died as well
Didn't give a damn about the world or even myself
That shit ain't easy to forget when I lost her too soon
And while I grieved for so long I was in the darkest room
Mad at the world but I was sad at the reality
From the loss and the society was just bad to me
I was really drowning and I'm falling
And that's exactly on how it started
That's how it started for real