Hope and Dreams Lyrics

Well, I'm at the age now where I should have it figured out

Had a story to tell, I forget what it's about

This the real me, the side I don't let people see

But there's a harsh critic and that critic lives in me

That's what it is though, that's just how my story goes

It's written in stone with the sins that need atoned

I'm a danger to myself, yeah, it's in my family tree

If you think you know me, just take a look inside your sleeves

Well, I can write words with my pen, but that pen is losing ink

I just stopped making sense, forgetting who I'm supposed to be

They tell me change it up, all my songs depressing

Think you're sick of it, well, just imagine being me

I've been spirited away, oh, my spirit needs a way

Watch me fade, a new place, I won't recognize no face

Keep the pace, just embrace one day, you will be replaced

Stay enslaved to a place where no one even knows your name

Who am I to blame?

Ain't no one's fault but my own

Not a king with a throne

Just a dummy with a phone

Just somebody with a dream and a smile just for show

I wanted high self-esteem but they charge a dollar more

See, I've been doing worse but I'm acting just the same

Trying to do better but the vices call my name

My trust like my Dad, it left and never came back

They want me to sugarcoat it, nothing's sweeter than the facts

I lie to myself about what I need to feel

I think it's 'cause I can't believe any of it's real

I look into the mirror and I hate what I see

If anything is clear, the problem's right in front of me

I'm a visual learner and I used to cut myself

Outside, I'd paint a picture, 'cause inside, I need some help

Having hope itself is both a dream and disease

But for your sake, I hope that you will disagree

I ain't ever been free, nah, I've only been spent

These words are my secrets that I probably should've kept

They always tell me it's okay but none of 'em have ever stayed

You shouldn't tell me it's okay if you ain't gonna stay

But then they always panic when I'm not doing okay

Really, all I needed was a good reason to stay

I asked God to write forgiveness, but the checks always bounced

Asked Heaven for a loan, but they always turned me down

Love doesn't save, but I got it, fortunately

Love don't got a say in happiness, unfortunately

You got a savior complex?

Well, saving me is complex

Ain't sure if they love me or just really love the concept

I look into the sky, hoping stars will show a sign

I can see us dancing proudly in the clouds of our demise

So check up on your people, you don't know the truth inside

It starts with missing calls, then they stop going outside

It's hard to stay sober, yeah, I'm always asking why

Playing with fire to see some light in my own eyes

It's just like back in school, this pencil is my only tool

You busy watching news, I'm changing channels on the truth

For what it's worth, at least I got the title of disgrace

Imagine if I'm decent, we'd run out of things to say

Back when I was thirteen, well, my Mama told me

This pain would go away and I'd land right on my feet

This for everyone who feel that they don't got a say

I'm hoping this can save the ones who tryna find their way

Somewhere I got off track, hope this path will set me back

To the way I used to be, but that boy may have died in me

Well, falling in love always seems to be a curse

I could love myself, but I'd look better in a hearse

Mama always said she'd love to see me in a suit

Keep on burying myself just to see my own roots

Maybe I could be saved, but I lost the will to try

Everyone who hates me, once said I'm a great guy

Really wish that evil wasn't seeking where I hide

Outside, I look alive, but inside, I think I died