Cadillac Dre Lyrics

What did the stone say to the dead

You're showing your age

What did the housekeeper say to the bed

Girl, you got it maid

What did the mechanic say

When a customer pulled up to his shop

Talkin' bout my tire popped

Can you please tell me how to fix it today

He said, If I tell you will I still get paid

First you wanna

Park where it's flat, engage the brake

Secure the wheels as you will

To keep the car from rolling back

Then you wanna

Loosen the nuts on the flat

You twist 'em counterclockwise

They should be loose, but still attached

After that you

Prop up the jack properly, then jack it up

Grab the spare, remove the the nuts, then swap the flat

Then you gotta

Screw the nuts by hand to get it gathered

Jack it to the floor

Grab your wrench, tighten 'em back

Star pattern

What did the hurricane say when it was swooping up ladies

A bay bay

What did Albert taste on the farm when he fell on his face

Hay, hay, hay

When a rapper in jail feels happy, what does he say

He lets out a Con-yay

How did a horse say "No" to the whip back in the day

Nae, nae, nae

What did the cop say when grabbing a plate at the cookout

I'm just tryna get a taze

What did the potato chip say to the slave on lookout

You stand and I lays

What did the barber say to the engineer in the studio

Can you make my vocal fade

What did the pastor ask his son when he was done playing the game

How do I press save

Why did the American vet shoot his pet on accident

Because he had cataracts

Why did the thief steal the catalytic converter

Because he thought it'd turn into a Cadillac

What did the mechanic say

When his lady asked him when will you stop

Working around the clock

He said when I go on break

Speaking of breaks, let me break it down on how to fix your brakes

First you wanna

Park where it's flat, engage the brake

Loosen the nuts, jack the car

Then, secure it on the stands

Then you wanna

Pop off the wheel, the caliper bolts, and the old pads

Make sure the rotor and piston ain't damaged

After that you

Clamp in the piston

Grab your new pads and grease 'em up

Slide 'em in place, should fit like glove on hand

Then you gotta

Secure the caliper over the pads and the rotor

Reinspect it, mount the wheel

Run a test, should be no more squeal

I'm rolling in my Cadillac

Coated in a brand new wax

Laughing in my drop

Until my wheels fall off

Dear youngsta

This is no conundrum

Death is the one thing that nobody can run from

Hum drum

The routine

We live and die

Some as teens

Some as grown adults

Some as babies

It's like it runs in the genes

Dear youngsta, pay attention

Pay respect

Pay it forward

Pay your bills, stay ahead

If you borrow it

Pay it back

Every tail and head

But most importantly

Pay me if we make a bet

Youngsta, let me talk to you a minute

It'll take a sec

Time is what you make it

Not what you expect

I went to the doctor he said

Sir, you've got ALS

ASL? I replied

He said ALS, are you deaf

Amyotrophic lateral sclerosis

Simply put, your brain's motor neurons are broken

Similar to how the ECU in a car sends signals to the engine to start, speed up, or slow down

These neurons tell your muscles to move

So you can breathe, eat, talk, and smile

Here's a wheel chair

He propped it down

He said use this when you no longer can walk around

I asked him what if I walk in squares

He chuckled and stared

He told me don't walk on stairs

The doctor spoke with calming tone

Three letters hit my comedy bone

ALS

I can hardly walk

I can hardly step

Shortly after

Ran into a couple of junkies

Arguing in the parking lot

Ay, yell less, talk instead

And don't do drugs, I briefly said

As I picked my prescriptions up from CVS

While I was there, I bought a camouflage jacket

To prepare you to see me less

You know I'm childish like PBS

I laugh so you don't see me stress

Truthfully, it ain't that bad

Truthfully, it ain't hit me yet

What's 2 fibs in 1 bar

A pair of lies with whiskey breath

Paralyzed from the top down

I'm not comfortable

But I'll roll until the wheels fall off

Just please don't leave me yet

Be my peace, I'll be my best

Be my arms, be my legs

Be my feet, be my hands

Be my right, be my left

Be my help, if you can

Be my phone, be my texts

Be my sink, be my crest

Be my breath

Be my breath

Dear youngsta

This is no conundrum

Death is the one thing that no man or woman can run from

In my case, roll from

I need you to know something

I was a clean man, but still I needed to gross some

I got a confession

I'm not proud of what I done

The camoflage jacket I said that I bought

I stole from a bum

He was searching for me

And with every ounce of fumes in his lungs

He screamed out you can hide

But you can't run

I used to wonder

When I die, wheel they bury me young

And when I get to the pearly gates

Will God turn a blind eye when I come

Why, you ask, what have I done

Maybe he'll turn a blind eye because he was too busy watching his sun

Jesus, my sense of humor

It gets me through the day

All these jokes in my head that I don't get to say

Dear youngsta

What did the headstone say to the grave

Rest in peace, sincerely yours

Cadillac Dre

I'm rolling in my Cadillac

Coated in a brand new wax

Laughing in my drop

Until my wheels fall off

Hey youngsta

Hey youngsta

Hey, hey, hey, youngsta

Hey youngsta

You will never guess

They got Cadillacs up here in heaven, yes

With the switches and controls and all

Don't be sad, I'm rolling 'round with God

These rims sit so high

Way up in the sky

Hey youngsta

You will never guess

They got Cadillacs up here in heaven, yes

With the switches and controls and all

Don't be sad, I'm rolling 'round with God

These rims sit so high

Way up in the sky

Hey youngsta

Guess what youngsta

Hey youngsta

You will never guess

They got Cadillacs up here in heaven, yes

With the switches and controls and all

Don't be sad, I'm rolling 'round with God

These rims sit so high

Way up in the sky

Hey youngsta

Guess what youngsta

Hey youngsta

You will never guess

They got Cadillacs up here in heaven, yes

With the switches and controls and all

Don't be sad

Said I'm rolling round with God

Music Break

Don't be sad, I'm rolling 'round with God

These rims sit so high

Way up in the sky