Santa's Lap (The Full Story) Lyrics

Oh, oh, oh, what do you want for Christmas

Well, do you want me to be honest, Santa

Oh, oh, well, of course

Well, um, I need some big dicks

Ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah

Christmas dick, bitch

Ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah

Christmas dick, bitch

Um, Santa, what's poking in my ass

Christmas dick, bitch

Um, and why does it have a curve

Christmas dick, bitch

Christmas dick sit on Santa's lap

He ask me what I want, him to make it clap

When he eat my fucking cookie, bitch, I drink all his milk

Sit on Santa's lap, bitch, pussy rubbing the silk

Christmas dick sit on Santa's lap

I feel a thump, and I ask him, what's that

I say, are you fucking happy

You're excited to see me

When he ask me what I want, bitch, he ask for a freebie

When I ride that dick, I ride it like a sleigh

Bitch, call me fucking Rudolph, cause I'm showing the way

Make it out under the mistletoe

When he say he about to come, I holler, let it snow

Twelve is more like a twelve-fucking-inch

I just stole fucking Christmas

You can call me the Grinch

When he climb down my chimney, bitch, I empty his sack

When that dick curve like a candy cane, you know it's a snack

Christmas dick sit on Santa's lap

He ask me what I want, him to make it clap

He ask me if I been naughty or fucking nice

I say I'm a naughty bitch, and let me slurp it like ice

Christmas dick sit on Santa's lap

I feel a club, and I ask him, what's that

He says, you checked it once, but you can check it twice

And all of a sudden, I'm riding dick all night

Jingle fucking bells, now I'ma jingle your balls

At this point, Christmas might not be happening at all

When I sat on Santa's lap, bitch, he called it a day

Left kids waiting for them presents like some fucking strays

Christmas dick sit on Santa's lap

Baby, a white Christmas is just all I can ask

And when I say white Christmas, I don't mean snow

When I'm talking about your sack, I mean the one below

Christmas dick sit on Santa's lap

Forgot to do his job while I emptied his sack

Drink his fucking milk, bitch, inch by inch

Ho, ho, ho, who stole Christmas

Bitches call me the Grinch

I got this magic-ass pussy, yes, it can cast a spell

And no, this ain't no silent night that got me screaming like hell

Yes, he fucked this shit so hard, he lost his time, couldn't tell

And now he's at Salvation Army outside ringing a bell

I got Santa fired, and no, he's not retired

Y'all say he don't exist, but then who said this ass was fire

Christmas is now in the grave, just cause Santa can't behave

And when I sat on Santa's lap, I felt that I had made his day

Christmas dick sit on Santa's lap

He asked me what I want, him to get his job back

And then I pull him to the side, and then I whisper and say

That if you do not get your job back, this will be your last day

Christmas dick sit on Santa's lap

As soon as I told him that he got his job back

And do not start to ask me cause I don't know how

Just know that when he pulled up in uniform, my pants went down

I'm not his elf, I'm his motherfucking cheerleader

He ate my ass, he ate it out like it's a bird feeder

He slapped my ass and then he kissed it twice

Then he said let's not forget about the kids tonight

Then I grabbed him by his collar and I pulled him down

So you wanna talk kids, let's go straight to pound town

I'm a flirty ass bitch so you know he can't hold back

And then I stole Christmas twice, call me the Grinch on crack

Call me Dasher and Dancer, I'm prancing on his pipe

Trust me Christmas lights are not the only thing shining tonight

And then he took me on his sleigh and fucked me all throughout the flight

And then he filled up my stocking and yes he filled it up real tight

Christmas dick sit on Santa's lap

He did not lose his job this time and trust me I asked

And then he asked me what I want like my cream ain't on his beard

Mrs. Claus is in my DMs, guess her man disappeared

Christmas dick sit on Santa's lap

He asked me what I want, him to make it clap

Then I told him about his wife in my DMs and he say

I'll divorce her then we can go get married the next day

Bitch

Do you now accept Santa to be your lawfully wedded husband

I do

Christmas dick bitch

Do you now accept Nikki to be your lawfully wedded husband

Christmas dick bitch

Well of course

Christmas dick bitch

Christmas dick bitch