Brownsville Porchlight (bonus track) Lyrics

It's been two years since I had a conversation with Death

I got through the patriarch of the family leaving, had to see him again

All these fears of leaving my hometown I expressed in the past

I deal it now and applied it all, the only one that can carve my path

The oldest of four children and when I leave, nothing is gonna last

I guess life is a cycle with different people, you can do the math

Maybe you know how it feel to be with roaches and inebriation

But keep up the persona of feeling better than men by generations

Silence is the best reward, and second place is staying patient

I only got a few months 'til I move out, my time is being taken

They say success the best revenge but I feel like I'm not getting enough

You can't unring that bell, my past actions got me feeling snuffed

Maybe this just another sob story you heard from 20 rappers before

But my pen is warm and the paper cold, I'm ready to risk it all for war

I did it time after time with no press, so something's gotta change

Maybe to make more art I gotta move back to where my momma stay

Maybe to get forgiven I gotta force these people to communicate

But you can't lead, can't make it drink, so you just gotta leave it all up to faith

It's been a year since my father said"remember the little people"

Realized I had a lot to unpack, looked at my slender hands, back to

Here is the church, and here is the steeple

I open my doors, and all that I saw was a woman

The portion of myself that I felt ashamed

As I grew older, had to get rid of her just to play the game

Even in my musical openness I never admitted it

Kept it tucked inside 'cause of syntax from inner city kids

The kind of people that would've killed me despite my associate

Y'all want me to be afraid of my identity, I'm not ducking shade

I'm not hiding Vanessa, we just grew apart as I grew in age

My locks are a constant reminder of the girl I was back in 8th grade

The girl missing a hand in her sweater, squint to cover her face

The girl who hung with people like her, and we all broke in pain

The man who sees those same people four years down the page

And the man who sees we are still broken now, just never really the same

You find comfort in the familiar, so I talk a lot about myself

Whether it be personal experience or struggles with mental health

Or losing somebody, 'cause we lose somebody everyday

Eventually the battles of a samurai is one too much to take

A Brownsville porchlight flickers often from moth attacks and pain

The ink from a quill is often lost every couple of days

But with gain there is always something sacrificed to God

So I dedicate these scribbles to the works and life of Ka

It's hard to transcribe influence without coming off as ignorant

Is it not bliss? Never exactly when your work ethic is rigorous

And maybe I'm too young to get it, to write this is not my time

However hearing those words made me think a lot about my life

The person that I've been and the person I will become

The baby that I was when we was eating off of crumbs

And the kid with two families hearing two rules of thumb

The independent boy driving out of Austin into the sun

Even in life and death, I will never forget where I'm from